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Roleplaying < Virtual Popstar

theAmanda and Alaskasweet (RP)

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
Star Wars inspired RP, we know the plot. c:
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She had never seen such beautiful planet. Alderaan was, compared to Hoth, a world with a repetition to have beautiful landscape. Not only a repetition, it was like everyone already knew that it was one of the most beautiful planets even if you hadn't been there. It hadn't only amazing landscape but also inhabitants that were known to be kind. Alderaan was a fairytail for someone like Corinne. Corinne wasn't really surprised that the rumors were true but something like this... it felt almost unnatural. How could the universe let something like this exist? It was perfect, in her point of view. Nothing she saw looked like ever been corrupted. Not even once. Corinne had been on many planets, so many that she couldn't really count them anymore or remember all the names. This was, however, something over the ordinary. In the horizon stood tall mountains, so high up in the sky that you couldn't even see the top if you looked from the ground. The tops were covered by a snow cover that looked like crystals when the sun touched it. When a breeze came, it was like glitter falled down on the rest of the world and made everything look even more amazing. The city was built in a way that made everyone connected, like they were a community where everyone knew each other. The city was built on the mountains and almost climbed down to the lakes and the green grass fields. Corinne felt a need to feel the grass. It looked so smooth and... even refreshing. The temperature were perfect, not to cold or to warm. You could wear anything you wanted. The sky was as clear as the lakes, so blue like it hadn't seen anything bad for thousands of years. What if they had arrived just a few hours later? Would she had seen a beautiful sunset? That probably was the ultimate view.

"Core, you're spacing out again." She shook her head and came back from her deep thoughts. She hurried to catch up with her Master that was already walking to the door into the main building, the building that the city surrounded. The building where they would met the Queen and know more about their mission. They had just landed on the platform and were in a hurry. Corinne had almost forgot why she was here in the first place. The Queen needed them and she was watching the landscape. She really needed to learn to not lose focus.
"Sorry, Master. It won't happen again." Her Master didn't look impressed. He turned his head at her just a bit and she looked a bit down at him. Her Master wasn't very tall... not tall at all. He was an old man and with the years he even became shorter. That didn't stop him from being one of the most impressive Jedi Knights she ever seen. He sighed. He knew that she would do it tomorrow again. His greyish eyes looked at her.
"First, we're going to meet up with an old friend of mine and another padawan."

Corinne looked suprised. She couldn't hide it. She... she would met another padawan? It was years she had been in contact with another padawan. She had been on missions and never really had the time to reconnect with old friends or former classmates. She couldn't help but wonder who it was. Did she knew her or him?
"Lets go inside then."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan looked around Alderaan, one thought was in his mind, wow what a view, Coruscant was not far from here, not at all so he wondered why would he not travel to such a place with such an incredible view more often. He was normally surrounded by windows and looking through them he would only see buildings vehicles and lights. This is as if a painting that he has been honored to be painted in. More fiction than fact. He must've been here many years ago but somehow in the years forgotten its luxuries and its magnificent beauty. He glanced over at his father or master if you will, getting of the ship. "Here we are," he said taking in the scenery himself. "We don't get enough of this do we?" He said looking back to Kilan that was more than shocked at how much his master seemed to dwell over the sight of the place. "Do you have a history with this place master," Kilan asked sensing there was more to the eye than just a simple admiration for the beauty." "You are very wise young prodigy," his master replied, "I met Hana here, you were here with us when you were merely in your adolescent years." Hana was referring to his own mother. "So as you may know we will be training with an old friend. We aren't here for a vacation if that is what you were hoping," he said "Yes master I know we aren't here for that, let us train right away," Kilan replied putting the imagery aside.

"First let me show you to where we will be staying. I'm sure they will be on their way shortly." He walked into an entry way that led to a big building in the looks of an oversized cottage. But it wasn't by any means poor looking. It was not fancy either. Fancy is a word he would use to describe where he lives. Too modern, too fancy. This place was in other words the opposite but in a good way. It hade life. It had character. And even though he had been there for only five minutes. Right when he walked through the entry way. It had a home like feeling to it. From the décor to the painting on the walls. It was not like what young Kilan was use to and immediately found it to be relieving. He walked over to one of the empty bedrooms and set down his few cases of belongings. He did not pack much for he is trained to do so. He has to be simple, it makes things more efficient. It is mostly just clothes and a few others belongings. Other then his lightsaber he carries with him he doesn't have anything of true importance. The bedroom was just as characterized as the house. It was a down to earth kind of room with a few shades of browns mixed throughout the different areas on the walls and crevices. The wood frames were cut with elegant patterns it was something he really could get used to.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:

Corinne brushed off some dirt that had gotten stuck on her black belt that she had around her waist. The belt were she had her lightsaber. She always felt safe when she had it with her. She let her fingertips touch the cold metal and smiled a bit for herself. What a journey she had done... from her younger years and being useless to really become something or someone. Someone who could help others. Corinne looked around in the great hall. It was crazy how many people it was there and in the same time so clean. The floors were white as well as the walls. The great windows let in light to the room that made the hall look mighty. The hall had a high ceiling and to Corinnes suprise it was a beautiful design there.

She sighed. She wouldn't become clean just becuase she tried to brush the dirt off and doing it right here would be inappropriate. She needed to take a bath or something. She needed to look respectable when she met new people, the Jedi had respect and she didn't intend to lose it. Corinne regreted now that she hadn't gone with her Masters plan instead to insist that hers was better. Well, it was better but it was also a plan that involved crawling on the ground. Corinne sighed. Did she get to change to other clothes? That would been nice but she didn't have any clothes to change into. Maybe her Master, Marc Rynde, had thought about that. She looked up on her Master and was just about to ask him when something on his face told her that they were in a hurry. Yes, her Master hated to arrive late. Corinne closed her eyes for a short while. She would met the Queen, it would look wierd standing there like a pile of dust. In the same time the Queen would probably understand that being a Jedi Knight wasn't always about meditating. Her Master walked towards one of the guards that was standing in one of the corners of the hall. The hall was like a room made for gathering, made the cliff between noblemen and normal citizens shorter. When something like that existed some order needed to exist.

"Excuse me, do you know if another Jedi has arrived?" The guard looked at her Master and smiled. A token that he knew what Corinne and her master searched for. It was probably not a secret that Alderaan had called for help... what now they needed help with.

"Yes, they are in the eastern building in the guestrooms. You won't miss it. Follow the corridor and up 4 levels. To the right and there you will find who you search for." Master Rynde nodded and thanked the guard for taking his time. Corinne and her Jedi Master walked towards the guestrooms. They didn't say anything to each other on the way there. When they arrived at the guestrooms, Master Rynde knocked on the door.

"It's me."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan stripped off his clothes he had worn on his flight and changed into the appropriate attire of meeting new guests, where he was taught that first impressions will be everything. When he was fully dressed he hooked his lightsaber to his belt. He tidied his things not wanting to appear lazy or unreliable due to uncleanliness. There was many who were here to judge him and his Master Lydonel. His Master was considered to be very respectable, along with the other Master they are suppose to be encountering, he heard his name was Master Rynde. That name was well heard of. Knowing he has made great significance in nearby battles. Kilan would be more than honored to work with him and his padewan. He looked over into the other room to see his Master was headed towards the door. Their rooms were connected by a hallway. Kilan took one last look in the mirror to examine his appearance hoping that he looked as presentable as his Master would desire him to be. He assumed these people being of high importance like him and his Master would be dressed in such a manor that would represent their outstanding rank. So Kilan needed to make sure he was perfect. Everything looked spot on except for one mark he could never rid of. The scar that was imprinted on his forehead. It was there to display the fight he encountered when he was only a mere boy.

He was 13 years of age. He was in Hoth. He was guarding a building while his Master searched for someone by the name of Motok. Kilan doesn't know who he was to this day. But he did not heed orders when he saw enemy fighters coming the way of the building and a young girl running down the street shouting a name that was unfamiliar. The enemy fighters were nearing her so he left post to save the girl. He killed them and assisted the girl who was very frightened. The scar was not from the enemy but from his own father who was disappointed in him for letting Motok get killed by not protecting post. He honestly did not care either way. He saved that young girls life. He believed her name to be Corinne. They were in Hoth for many months after that, he would sneak out to see this girl in the midst of the night. But sadly one day he left Hoth, without ever getting to say a goodbye.

He heard this Master open the door to let them in. He sighed trying to push that memory away. He shook his head, and pulled himself together. First impressions are everything. He began to walk down the small hallway into his Masters room.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
Corinne would lie if she said that she wasn't nervous, she was almost afraid... if she now was allowed to have that feeling. Not for the unknown mission but from a source within herself. She felt something was about to happen, like something was shaking and preparing to change her point of view forever - something that was her destiny. Did it sound silly? She had felt this feeling sometimes when bad things or good things happened. Her Master had said that it was an ability to see the future only the force sensetive had. Corinne knew better, this wasn't a vision. This was more... she didn't even know how to explain it.

She knew that doubt and fear was the way down to the dark side. All the stories about the Sith terrified her. The way they killed without give a thought about the life they just taken or the horrible consequences. She still remembered the first time she saw someone get killed. It was scary but in the same time a joy she never felt before but that wasn't for the beauty of death. It was because she got hope from someone who protected her. Corinne smiled to herself. Yes, the reason she joined the Jedi Order in the first place. She remembered the boy who came running towards her, not having any selfish thoughts in his mind, trying to save her. Corinne felt something inside her become warm. Kilan, was her saviors name. She would never forget that or the nights after it. He was someone special and would always be. She would never allow herself down the road to the dark side. She focused. She would be a shame for that boy... or man.. becuase he had probably grown up by now. Her Master looked at her. Studied her movement. She looked up at him. Marc could read her feelings like an open book. He had said that he tried not to but... he was worried and needed to know how long she had came in her training. He was probably a bit disappointed but he had said that she was one of the most talented padawans he had been a mentor to.

The door opened before them. The door that was the start of this new adventure. Corinne could see a glimse of the room before her Master walked in. She followed him inside. This room was a dream. She looked at the Master before her. Something with him seemed... familiar. Corinne couldn't really point out what. She bowed to show that she was polite, even if she was a mess. Her braid where almost about to go up and her skin were probably darker then usual by all the dirt. The only thing that looked clear was her ice blue eyes.

"It's nice to see you again, Lydonel. It has happened so much since we last saw each other." Her Master walked to the other Master and they shook hands. Master Lydonel? He was a famous Jedi Master, a role-model that almost every padawan wanted to be like. He had done so much for the greater good and saved so many lives. His padawan was probably a raw talent.
"It's a honor to met you in person, Master Lydonel." Corinne had to say something, she couldn't stay there in silent. She looked up and smiled a bright smile.
"This must be your padawan, what's your name?"
"Corinne Ainsley."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan stood in the hall listening. He swore he had heard a female voice that sounded familiar. So sweet and kind. He wondered if that was Master Rynde padewan. He felt this sudden sense of shyness that he has never experienced before. He is normally the obedient brave jedi in training he has always been. That lead him to a sudden confusion. All about this he sensed was peculiar and familiar at the same time how could that be possible he wondered. He took a few extra minutes. He did not want to go out there all worked up about this strange sense he has been getting. Why now? He wondered knowing now of all moments is very important not only to him but also to his Master. He took a few deep breaths.

He knew he had to get out of this hallway but for some reason he felt frozen like if he entered his Masters room that nothing would be the same, that everything would alter and would be different. Perhaps he is visioning a new attack? Maybe these people aren't the people that his Master once knew, but he knows how wise his Master is. There is no way that he would sense something that his Master would be oblivious to. After all he did get his sense from his Master. So what could this possibly be. His mind was all over the place. Maybe his sense is playing tricks on him? Maybe he hasn't gotten it under control as well as he thought. He put his head to the ground. Maybe he is just falling apart from all the stress, this is highly unlikely for him, training, meditating, his mind has been clear. He just could not understand what was wrong with him.

He had no more time to ponder this for his Master grew impatient, "Young prodigy, what might you be doing in there where our guests are right here?" Kilan could tell by his Maters voice that there would be consequences to this later. Kilan sighed. Hoping that he can maintain his composure. Wondering why right now of all times, he walked into his Masters room and said "Welcome legendary Master Rynde, and welcome.." He looked over to her face. He lost his words and just stared into the ice blue eyes.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
When Master Lydonel walked away a short while to get his padawan Master Rynde turned towards her. Something in his eyes where wondering. "What thoughts are you fighting, Core? You aren't acting like usual. You are always calm but your heart is racing." Corinne laughed quietly. Yes, she knew that her master would notice it. She looked down at her feets. She had a funny feeling she didn't really know how to respond to. She knew the rules of the Jedi Order, saying that love was complicated and if you would become a jedi you shouldn't find attachments. Always staying in the present and look forward to the future. She had, however, allowed herself to hold on to the thought of her savior and her body always acted like that when her thoughts were on him. Sure, her thought about him was an attachment but... she didn't know. It felt complicated.
"Do you believe in fate, Master?" Master Rynde looked away and started to mumble by himself. Corinne didn't want to bring up that she felt something within the force. That would worry him. Everything worried him but he always accepted it as a part of precaution. "Yes," he finally said in the same moment the Master came back. "I think the force has created a path for all of us."

The padawan came into the room and as soon has he started speaking something interrupted him. The same feeling overwhelmed her, that funny feeling, stronger this time then ever before. Corinne wasn't really prepared for it even if her senses had said before she entered the room that something would happen. It was... she had never really felt anything like it. It was a feeling from very old times. A warm, beautiful feeling, that said that everything would be okay... as long as those eyes looked at her. It was then she relized. He stopped talking as soon as he looked at her. Why? She studied him and it only took a few seconds. She should have seen it much sooner. He was just as she remembered him. He had just grown older... and had become a man instead of the boy she once knew. He had the same dark hair that was perfectly fixed, had the same eyes... looking just at her, a bit confused. He was like a prince in a fairytail. He was the most beautiful man she ever seen and the longer she looked at him the more she saw it: He hadn't changed at all. She wondered what he saw.

"Kilan..?" She didn't know if anyone even heard her voice so she talked with a stronger voice the second time. "Is it really you?" It must have been a reason she began thinking about him just as he turned up in front of her. She didn't know how to react as herself. She wanted to run towards him and hug him, talking about what she had been through. She couldn't. It wasn't Jedi way. So she just stood there. Questioning herself what she should do.

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
What could he possibly do, act like it was not her? He could not do that.. could he? That would be wrong. But he did not want to mess up this greet with another great jedi master, he needed to make this discreet, he would have to come up with a plan to talk with her alone, something that would not draw any suspicion. If his father was to figure out she was the one that made him be disobedient for the first time in his entire life, than he would loose all respect for her, and put him on constant watch. The mission would sure to be flawed if his father were to discover this truth. Also to discover that Kilan could possibly have some kind of attraction towards her. Its a force so strong that draws him to her.

He had dreams, of the same person, and the same challenge. It would be a figure of a girl. It was not in much detail but was clear it was an attractive female. She was in distress. But he would have to give something of importance up for her. There would be a man with an old raspy voice telling him if he wanted to see this woman alive again, he would have to hand over his lightsaber. He would comply and handover his grandfather's lightsaber. The old man would then laugh, and say, "You fool, you gave up everything for nothing." The last thing Kilan would see is ice blue eyes before she would vanish. This happened every night. He would wake up at dawn with a troubled mind, not knowing why he would have dreams of this girl.. or why it would be the same one repeatedly. and why could he not save her. He had saved her, so the dream did not make sense to him, he would meditate. Spend hours trying to calm his unfocused mind.

He had no more time to stall so he decided at the last second to play it cool and act like they were just meeting till he could get her alone, then explain the situation thoroughly. "It is a pleasure to meet you Corinne." He said trying to sound authentic in front of the Masters. "Master if you do not mind I would like to show my fellow padewan to her room so she may get unpacked and ready for training. I have already done so. Just to make the process go quicker. More efficient," he added with a nod. Trying not to make this so obvious. His Master and her Master nodded in agreement, both of them knowing they had many years of battle stories to discuss, he lead Corinne to her room, he stood there not even knowing where to start, just examining her and how much she had changed.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
For the first time in Corinnes life she didn't understand the Jedi code. No, she understood why they lived their lives the way they did but she didn't agree on everything. 'There is no emotion, there is peace'? Why was it inappropriate to show that you cared? Corinne had always found herself calm when she thought about the once she cared about. She always knew the best things to do when she had them in the corner of her mind. 'There in no passion, there is serenity"? This part made her most confussed. Why was it wrong to cheerish and hold someone dear? If she was alone she wouldn't feel serenity. She would feel alone and the shadows crawling towards her. Serenity... it was such a wierd word. How could that be something that the Jedi Order wanted the members to act like? It was such an old fashion way of thinking... it gave a lonely future and a lonely death with only the force by the side. Sometimes she thought that the Jedi Order maybe misunderstood the meaning behind the code and that it had to be something more then those words.

The Jedi Order had been the way it was now for hundreds of years. This way of thinking: Was that really the way the force wanted the beings that held it to live like? It was in a way laughable. To always protect, to always do the right thing and to always be mindfull of the thoughts. To be able to do that you needed a frame to act within and something that always pulled you back when you were near the egde. Having someone by your side made you able to see clear. She had always found herself thinking about the day she got saved by Kilan. It was that who made her determinded to also protect others but... she understood. They had to be able to sacrifice anything to be able to protect the peace. If she had to chose, it had to be for the greater good and not for anyone else, even if the consequenses would be terrible. Would she be able to do that when the time came? She had never really been near death and felt it breath her in the neck. What would she do when that time came?

Something inside her stabbed her. Just for a moment she had shown great weakness. She had to know her place, she hadn't acted like a Jedi. She understood that when Kilan started to talk. He radiated a strength and a knowlegde that was remakable. She wished that she was like him. When he leaded the way to her room she couldn't help but be disappointed in herself. She had to grow up now. It didn't matter if he didn't cheerish the past like she had. It didn't matter if he hadn't thought about her as she thought about him. As long as she never lost that feeling everything would be okay. She felt everything within her become calm and be in a harmony. She slightly smiled and nodded. She bowed a last time and followed Kilan. When they started to walk towards her room she had to take the oppertunity to say that she was sorry. She had almost made the meeting unformal infront of two masters. If Kilan hadn't saved the situation it maybe wouldn't end up as good as it now did.

"I'm sorry, what just happened.. it won't happen again."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan was so lost and confused, if they were not suppose to have worldly possessions or emotions, then why would such a scenario happen, he wondered if fate was real, he wondered if this was suppose to be some kind of challenge set upon them testing their, strength, knowledge, and dedication towards the jedi order. To remain loyal to the rules, but he had not remained loyal in the past. He did not heed orders when he saw the blue eyed girl. He left post failing the mission to save her. He had never even had regretful thoughts after. Even when his father yelled at him, even when his father hit him with the back of his lightsaber. He had the mark from that day on his forehead. But all this time he had thought of that mark not to remind him of the consequences of not obeying orders, but a reminder of the girl he had saved. The life he had protected. Not the loss of Motok.

He could swear his father still shows disappointment from that night he failed him, the only time he had failed him. It is as if his master expects him to mess it up. He is waiting for Kilan to fail. Soon enough he will. His master wants him to fail, fate wants him to fail, presenting the girl who made him risk so much, jeopardizing so much. All his time he thought it was okay, he had a sense of pride for rescuing her. But at this moment in time, he is rethinking everything. What if this was a punishment for not regretting his failure in Hoth. Maybe it has finally came back to haunt him. Now his father with figure out, this is the girl? He would be furious. He would not let them work together. Which might be a good thing seeming how this girl messed with his mind. His senses. His thoughts, all going crazy just with her being here. He simply could not focus.

He was seriously considering telling her they needed to forget what happened, to move on with their lives, to be professional. But when he heard what she had to say it actually hurt him, to think she was considering the same thing. Secretly Kilan wished she would say that she could not forget . That they should sneak around together like they had once done in the past. But ultimately his hopes were crushed when she apologized and said it wont happen again. What did she mean? Her recent outburst, or what they had in general? He sighed. Not sure of anything anymore. "You're apology is accepted," he said sounding cold.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
As soon as he stopped talking, she stopped walking. She wanted to continue walking and act like she hadn't reacted to what he just had said but she did. It was like an arrow shot her in the back. She replayed his voice in her head again. The words ecoed in her head. Corinne had never heard his voice that low, giving of such cold vibes. Everytime she had thought about him she always heard that encouraging voice that made her believe in herself. Had she done something wrong? She thought about it. Was she wrong to give an apology? No, that was not it. It was the right thing to do. Did... did he not want to accept it? It only leaded her to one thought: Did he want to decline being friends with her just becuase she hadn't thought through her actions before? She frowned to herself. Friends? It sounded somehow wrong. Every time she looked at him she tried to remember every line and color on his face. She tried to understand the way he walked and how he could make something everyone did so.. amazing. She liked the way he moved. He looked so strong and he probably was. She could only tell by his apperence that he had trained a lot and gained muscels. He was, just by standing there, tattooing everything he did in her soul. She really liked everything with him. Her heart skipped a beat when he told her he remembered her and now... now she was near to fall to the ground. She didn't see him as a friend... even if she hadn't had so many friends in her childhood.

She had one... so-called friend. His name was... no. She didn't remember his name. Something with the letter R. He always tricked her into trouble and then someone else needed to help her get out of the situation. If she had the knowlegde she had now she would have done something about that twisted mind of his. One time, when they were out playing in the snow, he made a tunnel and told her to crowl to the other side. Corinne, who believed in kindness, didn't expect that he would bury her alive. Corinne put her hands crossed over her chest. She couldn't fall to the ground. Even if it felt like she was in that ice tunnel again and had weight on her shoulders.

"What is it?" She couldn't help herself. She needed to know. She couldn't even move a step if he didn't like her. It was different from not cheering the past. If he disliked her... if she irritated him... She wouldn't be able to breath. She almost wished herself back to the past. To the time when she didn't know anything about duty. What that would had made it easier. Then she would take the chance to say what she wanted.

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan felt everything about her mood alter. She grew upset and worried all so very quick. He felt sympathy towards her. But she was the one for apologizing about them right? He did not know how to react to her very reaction. Everything about her confused him, her actions, her reactions, her dialogue, and her emotions, she has a lot of emotions for a jedi in training. Quite frankly around her, he has some emotions himself. That she should not admit not even to her. But she was desperately upset. What was he to do leave her upset, ignore her frustration. That would not make for a positive working environment. He needed to be kind with her but not to kind for if they make the same choices as they did when they were young there will be worse consequences.

They weren't kids anymore, sneaking around, having feelings for one and other. That would be at high risk. They couldn't possibly get away with that. When they were younger, and his father had figured out, he actually showed restraint when striking him, it could have been far worse, but because they shared the same blood, master or not, and because he was young, he did not go any further than that. Besides the scar isn't what bothers him the most, it the expectation of failure that his father had placed upon him since that very day he abandoned post and failed the mission, his father has never taken that expectation down, even after all the successful missions, the intense training, the loyalty, and obedience. It is not enough to ever take back that one failure.

So with that being established, what would there be to say to her. Corinne seemed tough on the outside, but still fragile on the inside, maybe he should be honest with her, explain that the past happened but if they were to maintain all that they worked for now, they were to move on. He would most definitely say that with a heavy heart, because he knew deep down, he did not want to move on either. All the dreams and thoughts about her, everything he risked for he when he was young, it was all worth it, so why is it not worth it now, what was he to do, Kilan cleared his throat and said in a nicer voice, "Welcome and it is nice to see you again Corinne." Not sure of what else to say in that very moment.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
Corinne closed her eyes and started walking again. She wanted to hear an answer, not an escape line. She was so used to hear them from her master and everyone else around her. It was a line to avoid talk about her question and sometimes when she asked them she wondered if they even knew the answer. They had all one thing in commun: They were soon to be or was already Jedi Knights. It maybe was the way to act. She had never really understood the way she should act as a Jedi. It felt so complicated, to always be right and always do what was the best for others. She always wanted to act that way but... sometimes she had to chose who would get it better. That was the biggest problem for her. For this instant moment: She thought she would gain more to know then being held to the shadows. She saw the both sides however: Maybe this was for the best, knowing what he thought could just make it harder. She wanted to think: Make what harder? But she knew, all of her heart knew. Make it harder to let go of him. It would be for the best really, both for him and for her if they just pretended that they never met each other. Corinne bit herself in her under lip. He... he maybe wanted to say something more. She couldn't tell. He was to profesional to show feelings like that... she wasn't however. She knew that too. She knew that he saw and felt what path her mind took.

The way he said the words was... nicer but... it missed something. The feeling of really meaning it. It was like he almost forced himself to be better just because of her reaction. She couldn't insist that he should speak his mind becuase, they were never allowed to do that anyway. As a Jedi, you followed the orders from the Jedi Council or, if you didn't hear from them, another master that agreed with your statement. You could of course have your own thoughts but everything you did was always a direct link to the oder. No one would agree talking about a past that involved... what they had shared. Corinne had to agree to this but... She got an idea. She maybe couldn't insist him to talk but she could at least insist him to understand that she was a padawan with potential.

"It's nice to see you too. You haven't really changed a bit," She smiled to that and looked down on the floor. When she first started her training everyone was against it. She was to old to start her training to begin with and she always heard that she had to strong feelings. Her smile slowly faded away. "But in the same time everything have changed."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan felt bad for her, knowing she had so much emotion building up like himself, but she unlike him could not control it. Maybe he should speak of the past, just with her. Addressing the past could lead them to move onto the future, right now they are both dwelling in the past which will effect their training and judgment if they do not find a way to deal with it. Talking about it may be their only option, because right here with her makes him mind second guess himself, nothing is clear. His thoughts are scrambled and he can barely figure out just from unjust. What would he to say to address the situation, he would have to acknowledge alleged events did occur. He would have to be sympathetic. He would have to be the total opposite he was trained to be. Basically his younger self that she is still attached to.

Remembering his younger self was all too difficult because he let go of that troubling way a long time ago to enhance his battle skills. He use to speak his mind when his master didn't make sense to him, he used to go off and do what he thought was right. Which it always led to being right but even so his father would be furious for not obeying orders, he had to stop acting like this for his father had threaten to send him to a different master who wasn't partial, his father thought the ultimate reason for Kilan's actions was his fault because Kilan being his son, he could not find the right punishment against defiance. His judgment was clouded and his mind was weak. But hearing that Kilan straightened up. Ignored his thoughts that encouraged him to speak up, out of turn, ignored the urges to go off and be the hero of battle a different way that what was requested. He became obedient, loyal, and most of all just quiet. He never did much talking anymore he was afraid of saying one wrong thing.

He pondered it over for quite sometime. When he heard her remark it made him feel as though she was right in some sense, much has changed, He lost everything about his kid self to become some kind of drone. All he did was take orders and fight. He did not say anything unless spoken to he did not act unless told to. He was not even a real person he was indeed a drone. Which made him cringe a little knowing his humanity and will he once had was gone, "Corinne, you have grown to be quite the fighter, I am glad, would not have wanted anything bad to happen to you in my absence." He said slowly trying to bring up the past again to address it and deal with it.

TheAmanda
Youtube star

theAmanda wrote:
"A fighter?" She looked like a question mark but then she understood what he meant. He knew that she could protect herself now. She was glad he said it... but he was giving her more credit then she should have. She was not a fighter. She wasn't good enough to be called that. A fighter never questioned themselves. They always knew what was right. Corinne was always doubting herself and never really understood what was the right thing. The right thing was such a point of view question. What was good for one wasn't good for the other. She never picked the right side.

"You are a fighter. Master Rynde are a fighter.. I'm... I'm nothing like that. Master Rynde has always said that I was a defender, someone who only protect what they believe in. A fighter protects what needs to be protected... or so do I believe."

Corinne lifted up her hand and massaged the back of her neck. She was exhuasted but really didn't want to show it. It wasn't suprining really, she had just completed a mission, met Kilian again and then had all of these thoughts. It took a lot of energy to make everything back to order. She wasn't used to have all these thought. Normally she maybe had one question in her mind she thought about all day. Now she had about thousands of questions and things she needed to make up her mind. Maybe her thought would cool down if she just got used having Kilan around again. She didn't really believed in that, but she had to. She never thought.

"You have become far greater then I could ever hope to become. But I do want to become a fighter, to always know what's the right thing. Like... the day we first met. You were all about saving lives and... you did. Even so young you always made the right chose. Do you know when your Jedi Trial will begin? Becuase... you really act like the other masters."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan was surprised at all the compliments and admiration that she was giving him, yes he did save her life, but he did not expect this. It was quite humbling. She seemed to look up to him, which he was not used to. It was a new feeling that made him have an extraordinary sense of pride. She was so sure of what a great jedi Kilan was but she seemed so confused of herself. This puzzled him. She was a very opinionated person when it comes to things she felt strongly about, but when it pertains to her she submitted to her lowest thoughts of herself. As if an inner conflict of right and wrong. A doubt in oneself that she could not ignore.

He felt obligated to help her confidence as a jedi grow. Maybe that could be a way of himself apologizing to her for having to put their past behind him, he did not like having to feel cold and heartless. He did not want her feelings to get hurt. Though she was tough she was also fragile. So he wanted to make her feel like a great jedi. For once she believes she is one she would not hold back and doubt herself, then she would have confidence. It would be his side project. But he knew he had to be careful, he did not want to get too attached which he knew was already happening. It was difficult with this girl. Not just her resilience, her intelligence, but also her beauty. She was indeed beautiful. He sighed knowing he was thinking too much into this now.

The question she asked caught him off guard, his master has not even mentioned his jedi trial, he knew why. His master does not trust him, he expects him to mess up. He expects the pass to repeat itself, no matter how loyal Kilan has been since, it wont ever matter to his master he will always be a work in progress. The nickname he has been given has contradicted itself by how his master truly feels about him. He is no prodigy if his own master does not believe in him, maybe if he was to explain that even he is not perfect it will make her feel better, "Well my master has not mentioned the jedi trials for he doesn't believe me to be ready, in all reality he expects me.." he sighed knowing she would not see him the same way, as some hero, "He expects me to fail."

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