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wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:
i'm getting used to it. i find myself in a lot of discussions lately, mostly abt social issues, where i feel like i've defend my entire identity everytime. but yeah.

I'm glad, I hope it soon becomes second nature. I find it's a very useful skill to have - to know when to back down & etc. Some people see it as weakness but it doesn't always mean defeat :3
I can understand that. I think everyone gets that defensiveness at some point if they feel someone is attacking their identity but it's clearly going to be harder & much of a stronger need if it's an identity that is constantly attacked

i tend to leave things when i can't deal with them anymore. both irl and online.

yeah and being queer and as close to trans as you could possible be, doesn't help

))

Yeah same. A lot of conversations irl I just drop if I see no point to them anymore - I get them a lot with my friends sometimes so to avoid arguments I just drop them. Sometimes I try again further down the line :3

Yeah I can understand how you may get it worse from others sad

at least though there is hope of society heading in the right direction with more homosexual rights coming into action (I hope you are in a country where they are - I'm in the UK and they are doing a lot to further the movement :3)

Account deleted

wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:
I've tried. I've tried to read about the things. I've tried to understand radical leftists. I've tried my very, very best, but in the end... very few of the things some of social justice seeking people say make sense.

Like, 'yes, freedom of speech is good, BUT censor all the bad words off of the media and stop being mean'. What?

I get that those people are trying their best to make this world better, but... in my eyes they're taking the wrong way. There's no point in pampering sensitive people and hushing other people's bad thoughts -- it didn't work a couple of decades ago and it won't work now either.
We should let people speak out their minds and then give them another point of view -- without yelling or calling them names.

That, or we should all just ignore all the hatred and live on without giving too much of a thought to it.

The only thing I think in that sense is that, sure, it should not be as such banned. But I think people do need to learn to debate & not bash more.
Some people do take things to fairly far extremes in saying they have been offended which if they have been offended, I am more than willing to apologise for. What gets to me is when someone doesn't say why it's offended them - without being told why it offended them, people can't understand the reasoning & also don't know how to not do the same thing again.

I may have interpreted the post wrong idk. I try and live off a term of 'water off a duck' back' but again, this is coming from a cis-straight (as far as I know, at least?) girl so I don't always have a leg to stand on. Especially when you imagine how it must be for people who have a completely different identity to myself.

like when queer and transpeople say something is offensive, then it's offensive like
we're not sensitive
we're calling out harmful behaviour.

Yeah I can understand that. Especially as they are coming from the oppressed side & from the fact that it is them who is being attacked by what it is said.
I feel for some people they need it explained, though, as well as called out? I may be overstepping myself here (feel free to tell me if I am).

Gothgirl
International star

gothgirl wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:
wow honestly? idk why, I thought that was a different band? I only really like the odd song of theirs though (never bought any xD - though my sister has)
I can see why. I can't think specifically when I've had it. I'd say one of the top of my head would be Miley Cyrus.

I'm happy about that :3 I can respect yours too

admittedly it may be harder for me to see as I am not part of the LGBT community?
I am open

as long as it's discussing/debating and not bashing then I'm 100% open :3

nah a lot of rock bands are extremely problematic
i cut them off

i'm a part of the lgbt+ community in two ways, so that's why i engage in many discussions about it. since if we as a community don't educate people or at least tell people to educate themselves, then there will still be bigots everywhere.
but we don't really owe them shit

true. When it comes to rock bands, I don't really search for them much on media anyway - mainly cause I don't listen to many.
My main genres tend to lie in Pop (which honestly isn't much better at times) & Folk / Alternative Rock.

I feel we need more like you in this sense. I come across many who refuse to educate - they will say why it's bad but they don't take the time to sit and discuss how you have. With some it can turn into bashing

. I think this may be why people don't get as educated as they should be (I think I've explained this right?)

Oh no I understand that. It honestly is a you should give a crap what we (as in cis-white etc or just everyone in general) think - it's just sad that bigots appear to have the loudest voices = I say to everyone, it's always the tw*ts that ruin everything for everyone else.

Myself, when it comes to non-binary (I think is the correct term) I struggle sometimes to understand because I don't see how you may not associate with a gender? However I would never be hurtful to someone simply because I don't understand that - it's my own problem, not that person's.

i research some
like if i hear something in their lyrics and such
matt healy is bigot - i still listen to the 1975 ?? sooo

like if people ask for sources, yess i'll give them some, but i don't always have the time or energy and people should google things them damn selves. it isn't that hard ....

and when it comes to being non-binary, it's mostly because the gender spectrum just doesn't exist for me
it's easier for me to deal with being nb than being cis, since i experienced a lot of dysphoria ( and still do ) with gender so yeah.

Account deleted

wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:
I've tried. I've tried to read about the things. I've tried to understand radical leftists. I've tried my very, very best, but in the end... very few of the things some of social justice seeking people say make sense.

Like, 'yes, freedom of speech is good, BUT censor all the bad words off of the media and stop being mean'. What?

I get that those people are trying their best to make this world better, but... in my eyes they're taking the wrong way. There's no point in pampering sensitive people and hushing other people's bad thoughts -- it didn't work a couple of decades ago and it won't work now either.
We should let people speak out their minds and then give them another point of view -- without yelling or calling them names.

That, or we should all just ignore all the hatred and live on without giving too much of a thought to it.

The only thing I think in that sense is that, sure, it should not be as such banned. But I think people do need to learn to debate & not bash more.
Some people do take things to fairly far extremes in saying they have been offended which if they have been offended, I am more than willing to apologise for. What gets to me is when someone doesn't say why it's offended them - without being told why it offended them, people can't understand the reasoning & also don't know how to not do the same thing again.

I may have interpreted the post wrong idk. I try and live off a term of 'water off a duck' back' but again, this is coming from a cis-straight (as far as I know, at least?) girl so I don't always have a leg to stand on. Especially when you imagine how it must be for people who have a completely different identity to myself.

That went a tiiiny tad bit beside the point, but you have a good message there.

Sorry

I thought I had but I wasn't sure. I'm tired and stuffed to the brim with pizza so that probably isn't helping my thought process xD

Gothgirl
International star

gothgirl wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:
The only thing I think in that sense is that, sure, it should not be as such banned. But I think people do need to learn to debate & not bash more.
Some people do take things to fairly far extremes in saying they have been offended which if they have been offended, I am more than willing to apologise for. What gets to me is when someone doesn't say why it's offended them - without being told why it offended them, people can't understand the reasoning & also don't know how to not do the same thing again.

I may have interpreted the post wrong idk. I try and live off a term of 'water off a duck' back' but again, this is coming from a cis-straight (as far as I know, at least?) girl so I don't always have a leg to stand on. Especially when you imagine how it must be for people who have a completely different identity to myself.

like when queer and transpeople say something is offensive, then it's offensive like
we're not sensitive
we're calling out harmful behaviour.

Yeah I can understand that. Especially as they are coming from the oppressed side & from the fact that it is them who is being attacked by what it is said.
I feel for some people they need it explained, though, as well as called out? I may be overstepping myself here (feel free to tell me if I am).

some need a bigger and more detailed explanation but still
google exists for a reason. a bigot will never change if they don't do it themselves.

Account deleted

wrote:
I like teen wolf and marvel and bands, depending on which one of course, but yeah. xD

Heyitsaada
National star

heyitsaada wrote:
cap, stucky and marvel? nice!

also, which bands? this is important.

Account deleted

wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:
nah a lot of rock bands are extremely problematic
i cut them off

i'm a part of the lgbt+ community in two ways, so that's why i engage in many discussions about it. since if we as a community don't educate people or at least tell people to educate themselves, then there will still be bigots everywhere.
but we don't really owe them shit

true. When it comes to rock bands, I don't really search for them much on media anyway - mainly cause I don't listen to many.
My main genres tend to lie in Pop (which honestly isn't much better at times) & Folk / Alternative Rock.

I feel we need more like you in this sense. I come across many who refuse to educate - they will say why it's bad but they don't take the time to sit and discuss how you have. With some it can turn into bashing

. I think this may be why people don't get as educated as they should be (I think I've explained this right?)

Oh no I understand that. It honestly is a you should give a crap what we (as in cis-white etc or just everyone in general) think - it's just sad that bigots appear to have the loudest voices = I say to everyone, it's always the tw*ts that ruin everything for everyone else.

Myself, when it comes to non-binary (I think is the correct term) I struggle sometimes to understand because I don't see how you may not associate with a gender? However I would never be hurtful to someone simply because I don't understand that - it's my own problem, not that person's.

i research some
like if i hear something in their lyrics and such
matt healy is bigot - i still listen to the 1975 ?? sooo

like if people ask for sources, yess i'll give them some, but i don't always have the time or energy and people should google things them damn selves. it isn't that hard ....

and when it comes to being non-binary, it's mostly because the gender spectrum just doesn't exist for me
it's easier for me to deal with being nb than being cis, since i experienced a lot of dysphoria ( and still do ) with gender so yeah.

really? any songs in particular?
If I hear horrible song lyrics I tend to go off of the singer & song straightaway. Especially with songs being such a powerful way to communicate with, bad messages are not something that should be spread through them.

I get that, particularly as I am a VERY lazy person. I'd probably end up saving a word document and copying and pasting the thing. True, I personally would like to know what to google but that it just a personal point of view. Sometimes I just talk to my sister though, she knows a lot as she has many friends who are, unfortunately, on the oppressed side so she helps me to understand it a lot.

So more associating as simply human and not having a need for a gender? or have I completely missed the mark?

Private
Youtube star

DadooDattoo wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:

creepinstall wrote:
okay listen
i didn't think spn was problematic or whatever the boys did was problematic, until i educated myself on the topics of privilege and oppression and acknowledging my own and others privileges.
it's okay not to be far in your own education on social matters, but instead of boiling it down to "tumblr people" and such, listen.

really it's not that hard.

I've tried. I've tried to read about the things. I've tried to understand radical leftists. I've tried my very, very best, but in the end... very few of the things some of social justice seeking people say make sense.

Like, 'yes, freedom of speech is good, BUT censor all the bad words off of the media and stop being mean'. What?

I get that those people are trying their best to make this world better, but... in my eyes they're taking the wrong way. There's no point in pampering sensitive people and hushing other people's bad thoughts -- it didn't work a couple of decades ago and it won't work now either.
We should let people speak out their minds and then give them another point of view -- without yelling or calling them names.

That, or we should all just ignore all the hatred and live on without giving too much of a thought to it.

"sensitive people"??

okay i think you should talking to me, because right now you're tone policing me because i'm speaking up about problematic behaviour and i think you should check your privilege. u need to do that. otherwise you wouldn't be offended about me pointing out problematic behaviour in media.

Could you please point out the place where I "tone policied" you as well as tell me what you mean by that? Because tbh I tried to be as polite as possible while delivering my message, yet you decided to read it in an offensive way.

I just checked 'em. I have cis privilege, and that's about it. Oh, yeah, I guess I'm able bodied despite my asthma and bad joints. There. Happy?

Account deleted

wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:
like when queer and transpeople say something is offensive, then it's offensive like
we're not sensitive
we're calling out harmful behaviour.

Yeah I can understand that. Especially as they are coming from the oppressed side & from the fact that it is them who is being attacked by what it is said.
I feel for some people they need it explained, though, as well as called out? I may be overstepping myself here (feel free to tell me if I am).

some need a bigger and more detailed explanation but still
google exists for a reason. a bigot will never change if they don't do it themselves.

Yeah I can understand that. A lot need it to slap them in the face (usually literally) before they see their error.
As I mentioned before, I think some don't know what to google/where to start? But idk (btw I'm not trying to defend them I'm just trying to understand both sides - curse my history & english language balanced arguments essays :/)

Gothgirl
International star

gothgirl wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:
true. When it comes to rock bands, I don't really search for them much on media anyway - mainly cause I don't listen to many.
My main genres tend to lie in Pop (which honestly isn't much better at times) & Folk / Alternative Rock.

I feel we need more like you in this sense. I come across many who refuse to educate - they will say why it's bad but they don't take the time to sit and discuss how you have. With some it can turn into bashing

. I think this may be why people don't get as educated as they should be (I think I've explained this right?)

Oh no I understand that. It honestly is a you should give a crap what we (as in cis-white etc or just everyone in general) think - it's just sad that bigots appear to have the loudest voices = I say to everyone, it's always the tw*ts that ruin everything for everyone else.

Myself, when it comes to non-binary (I think is the correct term) I struggle sometimes to understand because I don't see how you may not associate with a gender? However I would never be hurtful to someone simply because I don't understand that - it's my own problem, not that person's.

i research some
like if i hear something in their lyrics and such
matt healy is bigot - i still listen to the 1975 ?? sooo

like if people ask for sources, yess i'll give them some, but i don't always have the time or energy and people should google things them damn selves. it isn't that hard ....

and when it comes to being non-binary, it's mostly because the gender spectrum just doesn't exist for me
it's easier for me to deal with being nb than being cis, since i experienced a lot of dysphoria ( and still do ) with gender so yeah.

really? any songs in particular?
If I hear horrible song lyrics I tend to go off of the singer & song straightaway. Especially with songs being such a powerful way to communicate with, bad messages are not something that should be spread through them.

I get that, particularly as I am a VERY lazy person. I'd probably end up saving a word document and copying and pasting the thing. True, I personally would like to know what to google but that it just a personal point of view. Sometimes I just talk to my sister though, she knows a lot as she has many friends who are, unfortunately, on the oppressed side so she helps me to understand it a lot.

So more associating as simply human and not having a need for a gender? or have I completely missed the mark?

it's mostly matt who says shit in interviews and on twitter so
i cut people off just like that nothing - i did that with halsey, with miley, with fob and many more

nonbinary is more like for me not having a specific gender ishhh???

Private
Youtube star

DadooDattoo wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:
The only thing I think in that sense is that, sure, it should not be as such banned. But I think people do need to learn to debate & not bash more.
Some people do take things to fairly far extremes in saying they have been offended which if they have been offended, I am more than willing to apologise for. What gets to me is when someone doesn't say why it's offended them - without being told why it offended them, people can't understand the reasoning & also don't know how to not do the same thing again.

I may have interpreted the post wrong idk. I try and live off a term of 'water off a duck' back' but again, this is coming from a cis-straight (as far as I know, at least?) girl so I don't always have a leg to stand on. Especially when you imagine how it must be for people who have a completely different identity to myself.

That went a tiiiny tad bit beside the point, but you have a good message there.

Sorry

I thought I had but I wasn't sure. I'm tired and stuffed to the brim with pizza so that probably isn't helping my thought process xD

Shh... shh... It's okay, no need to be embarrassed.

Account deleted

wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:
I've tried. I've tried to read about the things. I've tried to understand radical leftists. I've tried my very, very best, but in the end... very few of the things some of social justice seeking people say make sense.

Like, 'yes, freedom of speech is good, BUT censor all the bad words off of the media and stop being mean'. What?

I get that those people are trying their best to make this world better, but... in my eyes they're taking the wrong way. There's no point in pampering sensitive people and hushing other people's bad thoughts -- it didn't work a couple of decades ago and it won't work now either.
We should let people speak out their minds and then give them another point of view -- without yelling or calling them names.

That, or we should all just ignore all the hatred and live on without giving too much of a thought to it.

"sensitive people"??

okay i think you should talking to me, because right now you're tone policing me because i'm speaking up about problematic behaviour and i think you should check your privilege. u need to do that. otherwise you wouldn't be offended about me pointing out problematic behaviour in media.

Could you please point out the place where I "tone policied" you as well as tell me what you mean by that? Because tbh I tried to be as polite as possible while delivering my message, yet you decided to read it in an offensive way.

I just checked 'em. I have cis privilege, and that's about it. Oh, yeah, I guess I'm able bodied despite my asthma and bad joints. There. Happy?

how did you check your privilege?

I have bad joints too - I have Joint Hypermobility. Of all the things I pick out a common ground I pick this xD

Gothgirl
International star

gothgirl wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

creepinstall wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:
Yeah I can understand that. Especially as they are coming from the oppressed side & from the fact that it is them who is being attacked by what it is said.
I feel for some people they need it explained, though, as well as called out? I may be overstepping myself here (feel free to tell me if I am).

some need a bigger and more detailed explanation but still
google exists for a reason. a bigot will never change if they don't do it themselves.

Yeah I can understand that. A lot need it to slap them in the face (usually literally) before they see their error.
As I mentioned before, I think some don't know what to google/where to start? But idk (btw I'm not trying to defend them I'm just trying to understand both sides - curse my history & english language balanced arguments essays :/)

yeah i see your point
but it should be taught in school
like how there is differenced between people based on their privileges and such
and how people on their own find their way to information around

Account deleted

wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:

Quinzelle wrote:

DadooDattoo wrote:
That went a tiiiny tad bit beside the point, but you have a good message there.

Sorry

I thought I had but I wasn't sure. I'm tired and stuffed to the brim with pizza so that probably isn't helping my thought process xD

Shh... shh... It's okay, no need to be embarrassed.

ohh okayy.

xP