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have you ever dumped anyone
Private
World famous



Evey wrote:
and what was the reason?

and how long had u been together
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 15:45
Private
World famous



bee wrote:
yes twice. both about 1,5 years
first bc he was shitty and i was not happy
second bc both of us were too mentally ill to be in a relationship
18
Posts: 13443
Date: 13-10-2022 16:03
Private
World famous



Evey wrote:
bee wrote:
yes twice. both about 1,5 years
first bc he was shitty and i was not happy
second bc both of us were too mentally ill to be in a relationship
hmm
with the second one, did it feel right ? or did it feel like u were giving up in a bad sense
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:06
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Evey wrote:
am wondering if i should break up or not. i feel like i don't have the energy it takes to make this relationship work with the premisses of having 2 hour busdrive between us, studying full time at the same time, having arguments that are very draining from time to time (and i hate arguments so much maybe because my parents fought all the time when i lived at home) but wondering if it's just me giving up or if it's legitamate that i should be alone for a while and sort myself out.

don't know where i will end up after school either and feels kinda bad to have to end up in his town after this since he would have 1 year left of school . like i would be stuck

but idk if anything is legitimate reasons to "give up"
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:08
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Evey wrote:
we've been together for 3 years and grew a lot together but we do have some issues left still when it comes to communication and to feel emotional connection (i feel loved but partly misunderstood and he very rarely talks about feeling but he is working on it)

and everytime anyone brings up "this feels bad in the relationship" it turns into a fight and i hate hate hate it
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:09
Private
National star



Sylvan wrote:
No.

I told someone no before anything ever happened like twice but that's it
16
Posts: 17412
Date: 13-10-2022 16:10
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Evey wrote:
Sylvan wrote:
No.

I told someone no before anything ever happened like twice but that's it
sounds like the way to go

i feel like i would have left this relationship like half a year in if it wasn't for covid making me feel like i didn't have any better options (we fought a lot a lot in the beginning) and then we just grew together and grew to underrstand eachother more but we still have complex issues maybe because not great compatability in the "core" who knows

too complex for my brain to understand

anyway i guess it's just me airing my business on vp skldjlsjdlksjdkls
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:12
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Evey wrote:
i kinda wanna ask my mom because she wants the best for me but at the same time she is with my father so what the fuck does she know about happiness/love !!!!!! but i guess that was a bit different because they had a baby but still
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:14
Private
National star



kagura wrote:
yea, we were together for like 2 years and i left because that was a toxic relationship (you can blame both of us) and i was in love with someone else. we stayed 'best' friends, like literally nothing changed in our relationship other than we were free to be with someone else. he's still in my life, but he moved to another town so we see like one or twice a year, speak every now and then 
seriously he's very great person and he thinks i'm very great person, but idk what the fuck was that relationship we were so toxic for each others and i don't think it was never romantic love lmao, but you live and you learn 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 13-10-2022 16:16
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
Yes, because he blocked me everywhere? And then he unblocked me n he was like "we need to talk bla bla bla" and I said I break up with u before he got the chance lol, cus thats epic stupid behaviour of him fr. He was a poopy head tho and I didn't like him anymore (or ever probably), so it was fine. Like 1,5 years mby 
16
Posts: 94811
Date: 13-10-2022 16:17
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Evey wrote:
kagura wrote:
yea, we were together for like 2 years and i left because that was a toxic relationship (you can blame both of us) and i was in love with someone else. we stayed 'best' friends, like literally nothing changed in our relationship other than we were free to be with someone else. he's still in my life, but he moved to another town so we see like one or twice a year, speak every now and then 
seriously he's very great person and he thinks i'm very great person, but idk what the fuck was that relationship we were so toxic for each others and i don't think it was never romantic love lmao, but you live and you learn 
so weird that two people can be like, nothing bad with them or anything but the combination just creates an environment that isn't good. anyway, glad to hear that you dumped them and that it was for the better!

when u decided to do it, did you know like easily that it was the right choice or what made u certain?
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:18
Private
World famous



Evey wrote:
ouch wrote:
Yes, because he blocked me everywhere? And then he unblocked me n he was like "we need to talk bla bla bla" and I said I break up with u before he got the chance lol, cus thats epic stupid behaviour of him fr. He was a poopy head tho and I didn't like him anymore (or ever probably), so it was fine. Like 1,5 years mby 
yeah that sounds mega weird, why block sjksjdsj u can just mute a person if u need space for a while

i think most people i've been with are people i've learned to like rather than me being interested first and i think that might be one of my problems
like i usually instead just like that they like me

17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:19
Pigeon
Youtube star



Pigeon wrote:
Yeah i did after a relationship of 1.5 years (but we were friends years before that). We had issues from one year in and we fought more and more even though we were so used to each other. We were in the same basketball team as well so we had to see each other even if we would break up... this is why we tried so hard to make it work, but when he did not have a present for my birthday (according to him it was still on its way but with all the planning issues before i couldnt handle it) that was too much for me and i decided to break up with him on my birthday. And it actually was a relief for the both of us after half a year of fighting
10
Posts: 371
Date: 13-10-2022 16:21
Private
World famous



Evey wrote:
Pigeon wrote:
Yeah i did after a relationship of 1.5 years (but we were friends years before that). We had issues from one year in and we fought more and more even though we were so used to each other. We were in the same basketball team as well so we had to see each other even if we would break up... this is why we tried so hard to make it work, but when he did not have a present for my birthday (according to him it was still on its way but with all the planning issues before i couldnt handle it) that was too much for me and i decided to break up with him on my birthday. And it actually was a relief for the both of us after half a year of fighting
fighting sucks so bad
i wonder what a "reasonable" amount of fighting is
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:23
Private
World famous



Evey wrote:
Evey wrote:
Pigeon wrote:
Yeah i did after a relationship of 1.5 years (but we were friends years before that). We had issues from one year in and we fought more and more even though we were so used to each other. We were in the same basketball team as well so we had to see each other even if we would break up... this is why we tried so hard to make it work, but when he did not have a present for my birthday (according to him it was still on its way but with all the planning issues before i couldnt handle it) that was too much for me and i decided to break up with him on my birthday. And it actually was a relief for the both of us after half a year of fighting
fighting sucks so bad
i wonder what a "reasonable" amount of fighting is
in a relationship i mean

people say that all couples fight but
how much should u fight
because i've been arguing too much for a lifetime (mostly in the beginning though)
17
Posts: 8488
Date: 13-10-2022 16:24
Pigeon
Youtube star



Pigeon wrote:
Evey wrote:
Pigeon wrote:
Yeah i did after a relationship of 1.5 years (but we were friends years before that). We had issues from one year in and we fought more and more even though we were so used to each other. We were in the same basketball team as well so we had to see each other even if we would break up... this is why we tried so hard to make it work, but when he did not have a present for my birthday (according to him it was still on its way but with all the planning issues before i couldnt handle it) that was too much for me and i decided to break up with him on my birthday. And it actually was a relief for the both of us after half a year of fighting
fighting sucks so bad
i wonder what a "reasonable" amount of fighting is
It depends... If the fights are quite small and mostly about little things like the dishwasher or something, then its fine. Then you can make it up to each other relatively easily and change the way you behave in a good way. You would make each other better, because of these different opinions.

However, with us, we fought because we had different morals and that is something you cannot change for someone else. He was very family oriented, therefore dependent on them and did not really share his feelings with me. I was very individual, had family issues (my parents were going through a divorce) and had the feeling he did not understand me when i needed him. He once even said i had to visit a psychologist because he couldnt help me and i still tried to make the relationship work by going there. Psychologist ended up telling me the relationship wouldnt work and that i did not have exceptional problems.
10
Posts: 371
Date: 13-10-2022 16:29
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