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feeling like faking
Private
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Levana wrote:
Ella wrote:
Levana wrote:
Ella wrote:
Mm.. i do this
I didn't tell my teacher i couldn't stand in front of class and do a presentation, because i was afraid they thought i faked it.. 
Til  i literally got asked to do mine and i had a full on anxiety attack 😌
that sucks and i hope u are doing better now ;-;
Since we haven't really done much. 
The times we should do it, they have told us only if u can or u can do it in small groups!
that's good!!
21
Posts: 11474
Date: 06-06-2020 23:11
Account deleted




wrote:
yeah kinda

i have clinical depression and ocd

when i talk about it i always think "why am i talking abt it? isn't this a personal issue? why should other people know abt it? why do i want them to know abt it? am i just looking for attention n is this all fake?"
Date: 06-06-2020 23:11
Murdurur
National star



murdurur wrote:
disintegration wrote:
yes omg

every time i am  somewhat happy or my life is not a disaster i feel like i'm faking my depression and other mental health issues and don't get help because i'm fine, haahahah then i fall into a deep hole and my life is in pieces and everythingis shit and i can barely brush my teeth or shower and don't leave the apartment/ house for days (i trapped myself in a 18 square meters apartment for 3 days without leaving once) and i'm like shit i need help but i can't i'm just so tired i can't.  Then i'm doing a bit better and i tried to get help two times during that short time span but it didn't work out. at this point  life gets really better (having money, people to interact with, a plan for the future,  more energy) and i'm back to i'm faking it i don't need help i'm doing fine and the circle begins again.

TW!!! I have scars all over my body from the bad parts of my life and when i'm in a good phase i'm like ohh i was just faking it i wanted attention maybe it wasn't serious, haha iwas such an emo haha they are ugly but i will get rid of them eventually because i'm not that kind of person.


the 'faking it' or 'doing it for attention' thing fucked me up a lot. intellectually i know it's not true and that sadly i am very much a mentally ill person but emotionally not so much but i hope i'll get there.

even if a person doesn't have the illness that they are 'pretending' to have, they still have a problem and are ill and should be taken seriously and recieve support


sorry for me ramblig but it's a topic that hits close to home

man yeah the whole self harm thing has been hella stigmatized like that for years and it's probably the biggest disservice out there to the people who actually self harm.

i love the rambling, thanks for making this post! i appreciate the insight
14
Posts: 7308
Date: 06-06-2020 23:13
Mercurius
National star



Mercurius wrote:
because others have it worse i guess and because telling myself i'm faking means i don't need help
12
Posts: 634
Date: 06-06-2020 23:15
Account deleted




wrote:
uh i guess if i try to explain why i act certain ways and how it can possibly be linked to being mentally ill, i definitely feel like i'm using it as a prop and to an extent it feels fake
Date: 06-06-2020 23:19
Private
Youtube star



Delusion1111111 wrote:
ive dont think ive ever personally experienced feeling like im 'faking' my mental illnesses. sometimes when i would feel better temporarily id be like 'oh it was never that bad maybe im just a drama queen' lol but ive kinda stopped thinking that way. 

BUT i do remember feeling like i was forcing myself to self harm when i was younger tho . Like the urge wasnt naturally really there exactly...if that makes sense... but bcuz i was exposed to some pretty dark sides of tumblr etc from a young age i was like. gonna try this out. N then i carried on doing it n yeah i do remember feeling like the urge wasnt authentic but i was still doing it . U kno what i mean. god im so incoherent lmfao but i guess that kind of relates
13
Posts: 6348
Date: 06-06-2020 23:20
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
But also im like 99% sure im faking for real so that might b why I think im faking also idk 
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 06-06-2020 23:20
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
ouch wrote:
But also im like 99% sure im faking for real so that might b why I think im faking also idk 
Like I self harmed for like 6+ years too but it was never really because of pain, only for accomplishment and that doesn't sound like mental illness lol 
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 06-06-2020 23:22
Account deleted




wrote:
i mean honestlie as much as mental illness awareness is important i feel like the way ppl on twitter and tumblr "raise awareness" almost feels like they're giving u a pass to excuse certain behaviour or for ppl to feel sorry for you 
Date: 06-06-2020 23:23
Account deleted




wrote:
Heaven wrote:
i mean honestlie as much as mental illness awareness is important i feel like the way ppl on twitter and tumblr "raise awareness" almost feels like they're giving u a pass to excuse certain behaviour or for ppl to feel sorry for you 
so my point is that ppl convince themselves that they r more mentally ill than they seem
Date: 06-06-2020 23:23
Gilmore
World famous



Gilmore wrote:
I mostly try to underestimate the power my mental illnesses have over me, so I think I'm faking it all to make me feel worthless and dumb and unworthy of love / help. So yeah, it's crystal clear that I am sick.
19
Posts: 5484
Date: 06-06-2020 23:24
Private
International star



Coralin wrote:
i have yes but that was when i first started realizing how ill i actually was. i don't feel that way anymorei think
18
Posts: 12668
Date: 06-06-2020 23:24
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
Heaven wrote:
Heaven wrote:
i mean honestlie as much as mental illness awareness is important i feel like the way ppl on twitter and tumblr "raise awareness" almost feels like they're giving u a pass to excuse certain behaviour or for ppl to feel sorry for you 
so my point is that ppl convince themselves that they r more mentally ill than they seem
Uhh yeag
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 06-06-2020 23:25
Murdurur
National star



murdurur wrote:
Delusion1111111 wrote:
ive dont think ive ever personally experienced feeling like im 'faking' my mental illnesses. sometimes when i would feel better temporarily id be like 'oh it was never that bad maybe im just a drama queen' lol but ive kinda stopped thinking that way. 

BUT i do remember feeling like i was forcing myself to self harm when i was younger tho . Like the urge wasnt naturally really there exactly...if that makes sense... but bcuz i was exposed to some pretty dark sides of tumblr etc from a young age i was like. gonna try this out. N then i carried on doing it n yeah i do remember feeling like the urge wasnt authentic but i was still doing it . U kno what i mean. god im so incoherent lmfao but i guess that kind of relates

no i definitely know what you mean. i did have the urges and stuff, but i was part of this terrible site that was just really competitive about posting the most fucked up sh pictures and it really pushed me into an area i don't think i would ever have gone to naturally. honestly sh support communities just never work out
14
Posts: 7308
Date: 06-06-2020 23:25
Private
Youtube star



Limbs wrote:
good question
16
Posts: 9825
Date: 06-06-2020 23:25
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