AtlantaG1912 wrote:Puftoss wrote:
im sure the man will be affected 2 if he wants to keep his baby but the woman doesnt
Well first
, there is only one socially and morally accepted choice.
The choice belongs to the host, the person who has to do the work, the woman.
The sperm donor, the man, has no choice in the matter, nor should he.
In a commited relationship, the couple may discuss the options as the woman attempts to chose her path forward. Hearing that a partner wants a baby, would support her and the baby may make her choice easier. It may not.
Hearing that he is not ready for that level of commitment and would like her to abort, may make her choice easier, again, maybe not.
The one sure thing in the equation is that she will bear most of the many costs, dangers and changes. Even if she continues the pregnancy with plans to offer the child for adoption, the immediate costs and risks remain hers.
A woman often jeopardizes a career, or advancement opportunities having a child. She begins to lose wealth opportunities as soon as she decides to continue a pregnancy. Career opportunities lost, career mobility lost as she will have a young one to consider before making any changes to her life. Housing costs go up, no more tiny, affordable bachelor places. Income gone on childcare, child expenses will be ongoing for a minimum of eighteen years. Can't move and upset school or childcare, can't work overtime to get ahead. Forget vacations, that gets eaten up by small ones being too sick for daycare or school. The list goes on and onā¦
Pregnancy is hard! Your entire body and mind is taken up with growing a baby. Sometimes you are sick throughout the entire pregnancy. If you are not sick, you are tired, you ache carrying around a watermelon that feels like it could tear loose at any time. Everything stretches and tears leaving stretchmarks, Chest, belly, maybe even your arms or thighs. Hemorrhoids, constant need to pee, breasts leaking. Near her due date, surgery is often brought up, induction, ceasarians. Maternal complications from childbirth are still very high. Women and babies die, have life altering complications.
Delivery is not easy, yes we get over it, we forget the pain, but OMG, pushing that watermelon out is body tearing apart pain and not for the faint of heart.
Then there is the hormonal roller coaster of postpartum. Yeah! We all think Madonna like smiling mother, tired but serene, with angelic baby wrapped in her arms. Not! The pain of milk coming in, the pain of shedding that which grew this baby, a two to three week period from hell, all while stitches and stretches down there are healing. At the same time, we have to figure out how to handle this small creature that can't live without us. It cries, it shits from head to toe, and eats all day and all night long. Will it never sleep for more than half an hour?
The commitment is for a lifetime! No other relationship GUARANTEES a lifetime commitment or support.
An embryo or fetus, both of which are only possibilities, can not take precedence over a living breathing autonomous human being.
No one has the right to force a lifetime choice on another person.
No one has the right to force a life altering choice on another person.
Neither an unplanned baby, or a termination is an easy choice.
They both have physical, financial, mental and emotional costs. The costs are born primarily by one person, and that is the only person who can make the choice.
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