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General < General
just being polite
Private
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Limbs wrote:
how do you know when someone's just being polite or if they really mean what they're saying?

i did some graphic design "work"* for my kinda-bf, and during that he said a couple times that he would compensate me for it and i was like "haha yeah" cuz i didn't know if he would actually do it. so now it's been about a week and a half since i finished that stuff and he has just asked for my bank account number to send me payment. but the issue is i don't know if he's just asking to be polite, and i'm supposed to be polite back and refuse it? cuz he does this sometimes, and he gets cross with me if i don't realize that he was just being polite and i do the wrong thing.Ā 

how would i figure out if he's being sincere or not rn? i don't want to annoy him. :/// & how can you get better at this in general?

(*Ā i'm not a graphic designer btw, i don't have any training in that so the "work" was just me doing stuff in photoshop as an amateur u know)Ā 
16
Posts: 9825
Date: 13-09-2020 14:04
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ouch wrote:
U can't tbh, except if theres a difference between when hes sincere n when hes not, tho its kind of weird to keep "being polite" (joking tbh) when u misunderstand multiple times idk
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 13-09-2020 14:07
Kit
National star



Kit wrote:
idk ? that honestly sounds like the kind of situation that would really stress me out but like.

"he gets cross with me if i don't realize that he was just being polite and i do the wrong thing." sounds like quite a red flag to me. i feel like in a situation like this the only thing u can do is just ask ? and u can explain that ur worried abt idk, offending him ? and then go off of that

like if he's saying he'll pay u for smth, and u say ok, and then he gets mad at u, that's manipulative af ngl
19
Posts: 12912
Date: 13-09-2020 14:08
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Limbs wrote:
ouch wrote:
U can't tbh, except if theres a difference between when hes sincere n when hes not, tho its kind of weird to keep "being polite" (joking tbh) when u misunderstand multiple times idk
well goddamnit lol
16
Posts: 9825
Date: 13-09-2020 14:09
Account deleted




wrote:
if he asked u for ur bank details, then u should just trust the words and give it to him.
idk, i feel like thinking too hard just causes unnecessary stress.
Date: 13-09-2020 14:12
Kit
National star



Kit wrote:
like if he's doing All This to pay u money and then wants to get mad at u after when u go along with it, he's ..... a piece of garbage !!!Ā 
19
Posts: 12912
Date: 13-09-2020 14:13
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Raquelle wrote:
I mean if he really asked for bank account just give it to him
you can say something like ohh but you dont have to if you cant no pressure!!
or well if you want to you can hit me with like five euros
If youā€™re super anxious
20
Posts: 39262
Date: 13-09-2020 14:13
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Delusion1111111 wrote:
'he gets cross with me if i don't realize that he was just being polite and i do the wrong thing'

that is honestly so fucked up Nd manipulativeĀ 
13
Posts: 6348
Date: 13-09-2020 14:26
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Limbs wrote:
Delusion1111111 wrote:
'he gets cross with me if i don't realize that he was just being polite and i do the wrong thing'

that is honestly so fucked up Nd manipulativeĀ 
well idk he's only rly done that once, and that had multiple times of me being stupid n not understanding leading up to that. usually he just gets vaguely cranky n i haven't understood why until that 1 time he told me what the problem is
16
Posts: 9825
Date: 13-09-2020 14:36
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