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Helper
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General < General
teach me social skills i need em
Kit
National star



im TIRED  of saying the wrong thing and pissing people off ! honestly asking fr this on vp feels a lil like getting drivers ed from an ostrich but imma try

like wtf is the appropriate normal and acceptable response to someone shittalking themselves. like when someone says smth like: "oh guess my work just sucks! guess i'm gonna flunk out because i'm a piece of shit who can't do anything right!"

like someone teach my dumb ass a convenient and appropriate sentence that conveys that i understand & sympathize, but don't agree ? & also maybe for bonus points suggests a little bit that they shouldn't say stuff like that bc it's a shitty way to talk to people (me) and makes them (me) feel really really uncomfortable?
Kit
National star



every day i wake up i try to spell ostrich with an extra T and i go to sleep
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you say some dumb shit like I do #DONTTAKETHESEADVIDES
"no that's not true. you're probably really good." 
" i mean it's probably not that bad, and u r probably gonna get into it soon"
 "okay if u say so"
or

if u wanna add the feels to it if u genuinely care you add something like
"but doing new stuff is difficult but i'm sure ull get the hand of it soon. you don't suck just bc you failed a time or two."

or be like
" hmm okay but i don't agree. you're probably doing better than you think and even if you did mess up a time or two u r still learning so i think it will be fine. what was the trouble anyways?"
Kit
National star



Nesta wrote:
you say some dumb shit like I do #DONTTAKETHESEADVIDES
"no that's not true. you're probably really good." 
" i mean it's probably not that bad, and u r probably gonna get into it soon"
 "okay if u say so"
or

if u wanna add the feels to it if u genuinely care you add something like
"but doing new stuff is difficult but i'm sure ull get the hand of it soon. you don't suck just bc you failed a time or two."

or be like
" hmm okay but i don't agree. you're probably doing better than you think and even if you did mess up a time or two u r still learning so i think it will be fine. what was the trouble anyways?"
hmfkdmh ik u said not to take this advice but that last one is actually quite nice n appropriate fr the situation and im gnna have to start practicing that one , thank u
Private
National star



> asking fr this on vp feels a lil like getting drivers ed from an ostrich but imma try

very funny and also true
Kit
National star



absintjente wrote:
> asking fr this on vp feels a lil like getting drivers ed from an ostrich but imma try

very funny and also true
yea man i'll take what i can get
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Kit wrote:
Nesta wrote:
you say some dumb shit like I do #DONTTAKETHESEADVIDES
"no that's not true. you're probably really good." 
" i mean it's probably not that bad, and u r probably gonna get into it soon"
 "okay if u say so"
or

if u wanna add the feels to it if u genuinely care you add something like
"but doing new stuff is difficult but i'm sure ull get the hand of it soon. you don't suck just bc you failed a time or two."

or be like
" hmm okay but i don't agree. you're probably doing better than you think and even if you did mess up a time or two u r still learning so i think it will be fine. what was the trouble anyways?"
hmfkdmh ik u said not to take this advice but that last one is actually quite nice n appropriate fr the situation and im gnna have to start practicing that one , thank u
you can take them, but take em with a critical mind bc i am terrible at this
Kit
National star



like okay how weird and shitty of a social move is it to go to someone and be like "i suck!"

because you're just really setting yourself up to be pissed off either way? 

someone agrees? understandably upsetting, pretty shitty tbh

someone disagrees? now they're not listening to you and """invalidating your feelings""" and you can be mad about that too
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i mean i wouldn't go to someone who i didn't think would be able to give me the support i was looking for
Kit
National star



Nesta wrote:
i mean i wouldn't go to someone who i didn't think would be able to give me the support i was looking for
o worm wish that were the case but unfortunately my best friend likes to go to me for support specifically so she can resent me for not giving the appropriate type of support bc she's projecting her issues w her mother onto me : ' )
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I think you should tell her that it isn't okay for u
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you need a new best friend
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