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one week of being single
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kagura wrote:
and how do people be single??

like i'm so used that i tell someone every little things that happens to me during days, like everything. and i don't think my friends really care to hear so much
now i'm just like spamming messages to group chats and nobody even responds. like lmao they don't need to i know they are not interested and they aren't even supposed to be
do i call my mom now or what?

and physical intimacy? i don't mean sex i don't care about that, but just like cuddling etc
i can't call my friends to come here and cuddle with me
ok i mean i always drunk cuddle with some of my friends so ... why not tho

i don't even want to make food anymore, because i can't share it with anyone it's boringg
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 16:23
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kagura wrote:
otherwise i'm doing fine actually. it was nice 4 years, it's over now ,whatever, time for the next adventure
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 16:28
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Barbarella wrote:
It's a good time to look your insecurities and any codependent traits you may have right in the ugly eye.
I think avoiding that is why so many folks struggle so badly to be single, they are afraid to hurt their own feelings and see their own shortcomings - but really it's how you grow.

Ask yourself why, about everything.
For me, the one that came up the most was, 
"why do I feel like I have to share every thought with someone who will respond? why do I need that validation of my thoughts and feelings?"

Your friends do care, but you've gotta remember that this is your battle and is there really anything they could say that'd make the situation better? Our friends get emotionally drained just like we do, it doesn't mean they don't care.
My best friend was there for a bit at my worst breakup, my live in partner of over 3 years cheated on me with my best friends abusive ex,
but there was a moment where he was like "nothing I say is going' to help, I have to go live my life, and you have to learn how to deal with this" and I was so mad at the time but in the end it made me stronger and more emotionally independent. 

you'll come out a better version of yourself on the other side but there's nothing wrong with feeling a bit sorry for yourself for a little while.

But you do need to cook and eat, for real.
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 16:30
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kagura wrote:
BrainFilth wrote:
It's a good time to look your insecurities and any codependent traits you may have right in the ugly eye.
I think avoiding that is why so many folks struggle so badly to be single, they are afraid to hurt their own feelings and see their own shortcomings - but really it's how you grow.

Ask yourself why, about everything.
For me, the one that came up the most was, 
"why do I feel like I have to share every thought with someone who will respond? why do I need that validation of my thoughts and feelings?"

Your friends do care, but you've gotta remember that this is your battle and is there really anything they could say that'd make the situation better? Our friends get emotionally drained just like we do, it doesn't mean they don't care.
My best friend was there for a bit at my worst breakup, my live in partner of over 3 years cheated on me with my best friends abusive ex,
but there was a moment where he was like "nothing I say is going' to help, I have to go live my life, and you have to learn how to deal with this" and I was so mad at the time but in the end it made me stronger and more emotionally independent. 

you'll come out a better version of yourself on the other side but there's nothing wrong with feeling a bit sorry for yourself for a little while.

But you do need to cook and eat, for real.
oh yeah i do eat, and a lot. but i'm just eating take away food or something that takes very little effort like frozen pizza.... goodbye dear moneys. even tho everything i've been through during my life, there hasn't been enough emotional pain to take away my appetite lol

and i know my friends care about me. ok i'm gonna cry but my bestfriend have literally just been checking me everyday this week just to know if i'm okay. also i'm gonna meet some of my friends tommorrow and one of them even cancelled other plans he had just for me
i'm so lucky to have my friends, they're amazing and i always make sure they know that i'm thankful that they have chose me. because it's not for granted that other people care about your shitt

and i'm sorry to hear you have gone through that ):
but yes like you said, it will only make you stronger
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 16:45
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Barbarella wrote:
kagura wrote:
BrainFilth wrote:
It's a good time to look your insecurities and any codependent traits you may have right in the ugly eye.
I think avoiding that is why so many folks struggle so badly to be single, they are afraid to hurt their own feelings and see their own shortcomings - but really it's how you grow.

Ask yourself why, about everything.
For me, the one that came up the most was, 
"why do I feel like I have to share every thought with someone who will respond? why do I need that validation of my thoughts and feelings?"

Your friends do care, but you've gotta remember that this is your battle and is there really anything they could say that'd make the situation better? Our friends get emotionally drained just like we do, it doesn't mean they don't care.
My best friend was there for a bit at my worst breakup, my live in partner of over 3 years cheated on me with my best friends abusive ex,
but there was a moment where he was like "nothing I say is going' to help, I have to go live my life, and you have to learn how to deal with this" and I was so mad at the time but in the end it made me stronger and more emotionally independent. 

you'll come out a better version of yourself on the other side but there's nothing wrong with feeling a bit sorry for yourself for a little while.

But you do need to cook and eat, for real.
oh yeah i do eat, and a lot. but i'm just eating take away food or something that takes very little effort like frozen pizza.... goodbye dear moneys. even tho everything i've been through during my life, there hasn't been enough emotional pain to take away my appetite lol

and i know my friends care about me. ok i'm gonna cry but my bestfriend have literally just been checking me everyday this week just to know if i'm okay. also i'm gonna meet some of my friends tommorrow and one of them even cancelled other plans he had just for me
i'm so lucky to have my friends, they're amazing and i always make sure they know that i'm thankful that they have chose me. because it's not for granted that other people care about your shitt

and i'm sorry to hear you have gone through that ):
but yes like you said, it will only make you stronger
I bought a lot of rotisserie chickens after my breakup lol
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 16:49
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ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
16
Posts: 6494
Date: 26-02-2021 17:03
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Barbarella wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
I love it lol
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 17:12
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kagura wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
yea seems like it
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 17:28
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Barbarella wrote:
kagura wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
yea seems like it
don't forget to ask yourself why tho
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 17:37
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kagura wrote:
BrainFilth wrote:
kagura wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
yea seems like it
don't forget to ask yourself why tho
well i guess it's mostly because i'm used to have someone so close, i haven't basically been single during my whole adult life
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 17:38
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ellem wrote:
kagura wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
yea seems like it
Ye idk I like to always b w someone and share my life with someone so the. Being single is just a drag tbh
16
Posts: 6494
Date: 26-02-2021 17:39
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ellem wrote:
BrainFilth wrote:
ellem wrote:
Idk being single sucks tbh
I love it lol
Wah i wish
16
Posts: 6494
Date: 26-02-2021 17:39
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Barbarella wrote:
kagura wrote:
BrainFilth wrote:
kagura wrote:
yea seems like it
don't forget to ask yourself why tho
well i guess it's mostly because i'm used to have someone so close, i haven't basically been single during my whole adult life
It's a hard transition
but once you learn to enjoy your own company, you're way less likely to put up with poor treatment for the sake of having someone else around
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 17:41
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kagura wrote:
but adult life is hard and lonely, everyone has their own lifes and problems, it's nicer to have someone around
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 26-02-2021 17:50
Account deleted




wrote:
Being that depending on a relationship really isn't healthy
Date: 26-02-2021 17:52
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Barbarella wrote:
kagura wrote:
but adult life is hard and lonely, everyone has their own lifes and problems, it's nicer to have someone around
That doesn't always have to be a romantic partner.
Expecting to have all of your missing pieces filled by one person puts a lot of pressure on them.
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 26-02-2021 17:52
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