can't say it - Forum - Virtual Popstar

Hungover
National star

hungover wrote:
"I love you" I can't physically get the words out, even if I WANT to.

My friend went off on me the other day for not being able to handle people telling me they love me, and also not being able to tell people I love them verbally - And even though he wasn't trying to be rude, I felt super horrible about it. I've never been able to say those fucking three words, it makes me so uncomfortable and I feel vulnerable..

Can anyone relate? What are your experiences? How do I get my shit together and learn how to say it?

Private
Popstar

autism wrote:
It's okay! Theres probably a reason for why it's so difficult for you to say it and I'm sure in future you'll be able to! I can't relate to this but you're probably not alone with this. Not sure why this would be a bad thing or a problem either. Not being able to verbally express your love towards someone doesn't necessarily mean that you don't love them. I personally think that actions matter more than words and I hope people around you appreciate your company and know you probably love them even if you can't say it to them.

Hungover
National star

hungover wrote:

autism wrote:
It's okay! Theres probably a reason for why it's so difficult for you to say it and I'm sure in future you'll be able to! I can't relate to this but you're probably not alone with this. Not sure why this would be a bad thing or a problem either. Not being able to verbally express your love towards someone doesn't necessarily mean that you don't love them. I personally think that actions matter more than words and I hope people around you appreciate your company and know you probably love them even if you can't say it to them.

I express my love by joking around, giving silly gifts and etc. My friends luckily know that that's my love language, but I wish I could tell them?

The closest I've ever get is shit like "I appreciate you a lot" or "I care a lot about you".

Private
World famous

BloomCissi wrote:
I doubt I'd ever be able to say that to anyone else but a partner. I've never said it, because if I did, it wouldn't even be genuine, and thus, it serves no purpose.

Private
Popstar

autism wrote:

hungover wrote:

autism wrote:
It's okay! Theres probably a reason for why it's so difficult for you to say it and I'm sure in future you'll be able to! I can't relate to this but you're probably not alone with this. Not sure why this would be a bad thing or a problem either. Not being able to verbally express your love towards someone doesn't necessarily mean that you don't love them. I personally think that actions matter more than words and I hope people around you appreciate your company and know you probably love them even if you can't say it to them.

I express my love by joking around, giving silly gifts and etc. My friends luckily know that that's my love language, but I wish I could tell them?

The closest I've ever get is shit like "I appreciate you a lot" or "I care a lot about you".

One day you probably can! It's nice to hear that you can still express it with other words! Have you told them about this?

Hungover
National star

hungover wrote:

BloomCissi wrote:
I doubt I'd ever be able to say that to anyone else but a partner. I've never said it, because if I did, it wouldn't even be genuine, and thus, it serves no purpose.

That's fair enough. My problem is that I genuinely love these people, they mean everything to me, so it is genuine - Just can't say it.

Hungover
National star

hungover wrote:

autism wrote:

hungover wrote:

autism wrote:
It's okay! Theres probably a reason for why it's so difficult for you to say it and I'm sure in future you'll be able to! I can't relate to this but you're probably not alone with this. Not sure why this would be a bad thing or a problem either. Not being able to verbally express your love towards someone doesn't necessarily mean that you don't love them. I personally think that actions matter more than words and I hope people around you appreciate your company and know you probably love them even if you can't say it to them.

I express my love by joking around, giving silly gifts and etc. My friends luckily know that that's my love language, but I wish I could tell them?

The closest I've ever get is shit like "I appreciate you a lot" or "I care a lot about you".

One day you probably can! It's nice to hear that you can still express it with other words! Have you told them about this?

I haven't directly told them, but I think they know.

Private
World famous

BloomCissi wrote:

hungover wrote:

BloomCissi wrote:
I doubt I'd ever be able to say that to anyone else but a partner. I've never said it, because if I did, it wouldn't even be genuine, and thus, it serves no purpose.

That's fair enough. My problem is that I genuinely love these people, they mean everything to me, so it is genuine - Just can't say it.

I mean, is it important for you to actually say it? Like, idk, actions speak louder than words, if we're going to be really cliché.

Hungover
National star

hungover wrote:

BloomCissi wrote:

hungover wrote:

BloomCissi wrote:
I doubt I'd ever be able to say that to anyone else but a partner. I've never said it, because if I did, it wouldn't even be genuine, and thus, it serves no purpose.

That's fair enough. My problem is that I genuinely love these people, they mean everything to me, so it is genuine - Just can't say it.

I mean, is it important for you to actually say it? Like, idk, actions speak louder than words, if we're going to be really cliché.

I guess it is to some people, and it's something I've struggled with for years, I want to be able to say it, y'know?

Private
International star

Maddie wrote:
I can relate so much to this, I'm the same way
if its online with online friends I can do it (like "love u" ), but irl people? cant do it
it really bothered my mother when i was a child, but she quickly learned that we could use other phrases or gestures to convey love
I'd suggest trying to explain or talk to them, maybe find a "code word" that means love?