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parent & christmas vent alert
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Bros my mom annoys me so much.,,.,.. n for friends: yes I am talking about this again because none of y'all lousey-s gave me any attention on startalk (jk ily all)
Like, she didn't even ask me if I wanted to come over this year for Christmas, she just expects so and yeah like assumes that there's nothing I'd rather do n ugh it pisses me off so badly like I really just wanted to stay the fuck at home w my bf this year and chill (I actually also wanted to last year, but ended up at my mom's with my sister as well), but then she posted a picture on FB of me n my sister sleeping on her couch n just wrote "soon this time again", clearly indicating that she's just expecting it to happen n I am wayyyy too shy of conflict and like yeah just ugh cba to put up a fight or like ,,, I don't wanna create any tensions or whatfuckingever so I just went along with it nnn now I'm going over there for Christmas n it's gonna suck cause it's not what the fuck I want to do. Bf n I haven't had a Christmas for ourselves yet n I yeah that's just all I've wanted these past Christmasses but nonono n I yeah I get the 'couldn't u just talk with her' thing but no I absolutely couldn't lmao contact is non-existent, last time I saw her was last Christmas n yeah we never chat or talk on the phone or anything n there's so much like emotional baggage from the past,,, last Christmas she basically told me that she does not approve of my relationship & lectured me n all that shit n I'm like. Fuck off,,,, so disrespectful I swear 2 god.,, which also makes me like nervous about this one lmao like is she gonna pull that shit again?,,, And when she's not being a rude cunt not approving of anything I do all we chat about is like... Friend-stuff, like aye did u hear that song n super superficial shit lmao our relationship has never been very mother-daughter-y so like no I can't start..... actually taking about things of substance with her now nnn shit,,, I don't particularly want to either ig
Also recently (again, sorry friends who alr read about this lmao) she had the nerve to ask to get a sweater back that I absolutely love and adore and care a lot about that she gave to me. Am so fucking pissed but like the wuss I am I just went "sure Ill bring it Christmas" nhfb fuck meeeee
n at the same time there's such a conflict in mi head going on between 'fuck this woman she's so rude I can't with her' n 'she isn't well though, like idk if her impaired cognitive function (from being seriously sick) has anything to do with her acting like a bench' so I yeah
send help pls

anyways I needed that out (again lol) ,,,,,,,, frustrates me sm
y'all also got poopy parents?
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 20:47
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
also oh my god I do not want to listen to her anti-vaxx bs,,, really hope she keeps it to a fucking minimum
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 20:48
Private
World famous



Emiliaaaaaaa wrote:
im sorry :c
a parent should be nice to their child otherwise the child is never coming back. dont feel any pressure to leave your mom or someone from your family that is rude to u. do things thats makes u happy and deserve having around u
20
Posts: 18405
Date: 04-11-2021 21:02
Private
World famous



Hufsa wrote:
oof. wish i could idk have a suggestion on how to do things but i dont ll/: ended up having to cut my mother off last year right before christmas and havent talked to her since. 
weird around me n my dad too but will probably spend christmas there.
i personally love christmas but i haate it. somehow its like families always wait until christmas to start drama and its so wtf. 

i dont think this is helpful(nor healthy lmao) but i used to have drinking games by myself. like eery time mom talks about x, says x, does x i take a sip. 
drinking around my dads side of the family is a bit taboo tho, so no fun there. istg i had a few glasses of wine on christmas last year and the vibes they gave off were as if i was pulling out a crackpipe.
20
Posts: 1812
Date: 04-11-2021 21:03
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Emiliaaaaaaa wrote:
im sorry :c
a parent should be nice to their child otherwise the child is never coming back. dont feel any pressure to leave your mom or someone from your family that is rude to u. do things thats makes u happy and deserve having around u

thanku <3
n yeahh ikkkk I really should just like. "Man up" or whatever n stand my ground a little but ugh I just don't wanna be left with no parental ties at all either n I yeah I keep hoping things'll get betterrrr n I excuse her crappy behaviour with her being sick n me not knowing if that's the cause and whatnot but yeah,,, I really should just like  .. cut ties maybe or tell her how much it's bothering me but I just feel so incapable of doing so waa
tysm for the support though, much appreciate it <333 hopefully some day I'll be able to do what's best 4 me
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:06
Private
National star



kagura wrote:
i don't know what to say. my mom can be very much indeed too and i have my problems with her, but i never try to please her i sure do fight back. you can really that i'm her child jeez sometimes i wish i didn't have her temper. it's not always fun either.. 
christmas is kinda other way around, i mean i don't care to spend christmas with my family it all being so fake and all. but my mom is like lol what christmas sorry if you wanted to see me but mommy is making money at work bitches take care 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 04-11-2021 21:09
Account deleted




wrote:
Tell her you have plans, lab. For your own good, people-pleasing and putting yourself in these situations of emotional distress is not gonna be a lasting option long-term. At a point you gotta decide that if she doesn't get better at how she treats you + you putting down boundaries on e. g. Asking you if you want to come before assuming, not talking shit about your life decitions, how much space she should have in your life, her respecting these boundaries... If it's a person or situation worth people-pleasing at the cost of your own peace. 

Offer to do something else close to christmas and say you can't make it on the day if you wanna keep the tie.  Bring the sweather if you feel like that's the right thing to do. You're old now, you get to hang out w other ppl than ur fam at Christmas. 
Date: 04-11-2021 21:09 | Times changed: 3
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Hufsa wrote:
oof. wish i could idk have a suggestion on how to do things but i dont ll/: ended up having to cut my mother off last year right before christmas and havent talked to her since. 
weird around me n my dad too but will probably spend christmas there.
i personally love christmas but i haate it. somehow its like families always wait until christmas to start drama and its so wtf. 

i dont think this is helpful(nor healthy lmao) but i used to have drinking games by myself. like eery time mom talks about x, says x, does x i take a sip. 
drinking around my dads side of the family is a bit taboo tho, so no fun there. istg i had a few glasses of wine on christmas last year and the vibes they gave off were as if i was pulling out a crackpipe.
Aw dw just getting it aired was really all I needed, I know the situation is pretty poop and there aren't many solutions other than me sucking it up or cutting ties so I wasn't expecting any either heh but waa appreciate this v much lmao, an hAHA the private drinking game thing might totally help me out this christmas honestly lmao I love that
but waa sorry to hear about your own relationship with your mom though!! But aye super good on you for doing what's best for you!! I totally admire that, must've been hard!
 n ugh yes to that families waiting till christmas to stir the pot part lmao, so annoying,,
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:10
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
kagura wrote:
i don't know what to say. my mom can be very much indeed too and i have my problems with her, but i never try to please her i sure do fight back. you can really that i'm her child jeez sometimes i wish i didn't have her temper. it's not always fun either.. 
christmas is kinda other way around, i mean i don't care to spend christmas with my family it all being so fake and all. but my mom is like lol what christmas sorry if you wanted to see me but mommy is making money at work bitches take care 
plS lmao sorry to hear waa,, but aye good on you for fighting heh I think that's rad,, good quality, not putting up with bs, yes
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:13
Private
World famous



Rochellette wrote:
Oh I need to share with you some good points about toxic family and how you don't need to keep it there, you need to move. If you're happy with your bf and you know going with your mom isn't the thing you want... don't go... keep distance from her I know is not easy but is the best for you😳
22
Posts: 12936
Date: 04-11-2021 21:13
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Nesta wrote:
Tell her you have plans, lab. For your own good, people-pleasing and putting yourself in these situations of emotional distress is not gonna be a lasting option long-term. At a point you gotta decide that if she doesn't get better at how she treats you + you putting down boundaries on e. g. Asking you if you want to come before assuming, not talking shit about your life decitions, how much space she should have in your life, her respecting these boundaries... If it's a person or situation worth people-pleasing at the cost of your own peace. 

Offer to do something else close to christmas and say you can't make it on the day if you wanna keep the tie.  Bring the sweather if you feel like that's the right thing to do. You're old now, you get to hang out w other ppl than ur fam at Christmas. 

ty for this Nesta,,, you're just .. super right as always lmao bfghvbfg,,, && ikik this wussy shit won't hold up over time ... I think this Christmas I'll stick to coming though cause now I alr said I will n if I don't I'll just feel bad now that I've said I would n blablabla but yeah I'll..,. definitely try getting shit sorted ughhh am just stuck in this funk where I don't want to take the first step cause ... scary lmao but yeah eventually it's gotta be done, it's for the best,, ty again, this is nice n n n yeah super helpful n the suggestion of offering to do something else around Christmas is honestly super good I'd just feel too bad I think,,, but it's deffo a plan for next year
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:19
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Rochellette wrote:
Oh I need to share with you some good points about toxic family and how you don't need to keep it there, you need to move. If you're happy with your bf and you know going with your mom isn't the thing you want... don't go... keep distance from her I know is not easy but is the best for you😳
Yeahhh that'd prob be the best waa,,, I feel like I alr promised too much now to yeah reel back in but I really do appreciate the support nn it's definitely giving me a healthy amount of drive to not let the shit go on n on every year, so ty for that <333
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:22
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Y'all are gr8 ty guys,,, reading all of these comments feels like listening to that badass bætch non-wussy voice of the alter-ego that lives deep (very deep) inside of me lmao ,... y'all are helping her emerge a little, I appreciate <3
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:25
Private
World famous



Rochellette wrote:
Laboratory wrote:
Rochellette wrote:
Oh I need to share with you some good points about toxic family and how you don't need to keep it there, you need to move. If you're happy with your bf and you know going with your mom isn't the thing you want... don't go... keep distance from her I know is not easy but is the best for you😳
Yeahhh that'd prob be the best waa,,, I feel like I alr promised too much now to yeah reel back in but I really do appreciate the support nn it's definitely giving me a healthy amount of drive to not let the shit go on n on every year, so ty for that <333

 Number 9 is the one to follow this time
22
Posts: 12936
Date: 04-11-2021 21:36
Laboratory
World famous



Laboratory wrote:
Rochellette wrote:
Laboratory wrote:
Rochellette wrote:
Oh I need to share with you some good points about toxic family and how you don't need to keep it there, you need to move. If you're happy with your bf and you know going with your mom isn't the thing you want... don't go... keep distance from her I know is not easy but is the best for you😳
Yeahhh that'd prob be the best waa,,, I feel like I alr promised too much now to yeah reel back in but I really do appreciate the support nn it's definitely giving me a healthy amount of drive to not let the shit go on n on every year, so ty for that <333

Number 9 is the one to follow this time
hhhH I knowww though it's just that I've said I'm coming ghfgbgn,,, but yes next year no caving in, ty heh
19
Posts: 72150
Date: 04-11-2021 21:39
Private
World famous



Rochellette wrote:
Laboratory wrote:
Rochellette wrote:
Laboratory wrote:
Yeahhh that'd prob be the best waa,,, I feel like I alr promised too much now to yeah reel back in but I really do appreciate the support nn it's definitely giving me a healthy amount of drive to not let the shit go on n on every year, so ty for that <333

Number 9 is the one to follow this time
hhhH I knowww though it's just that I've said I'm coming ghfgbgn,,, but yes next year no caving in, ty heh
I know is difficult but you can find an excuse anything and don't go this year, maybe next year you'll find yourself in the same situation you know! Is a vicious cycle 😥😞
22
Posts: 12936
Date: 04-11-2021 21:58
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