i'm going to see - Forum - Virtual Popstar

i'm going to see

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kagura wrote:
my childhood bestfriend tommorrow. i'm nervous about that. last time i saw her was in summer and i did not enjoy our time together. we have grown apart which is normal and okay, but the thing is... i think she hasn't really grown at all. in some ways yes of course, but....
she is so disrespectful to other people, i mean she has said some very rude stuff about people in my life she doesn't even know.
she has said some random racist stuff and when i point that out to her, she's just like "oh okay sorry i didn't realise you can't say that anymore, that's just how I AM used to say that so oh jeez i'm so sorrry" like this is literally not about you but ok and also fuck you
i always let her now i'm not okay with stuff she says and does, then she's always like what's wrong with you you would have laughed about this before. yeah i would have laugh at that when i was 16??? i'm adult now that's not funny or cool anymore

also i feel like i can't really tell her much about my life, becaue she doesn't really understand anything i do at all. no matter if it's about my way of thinking about relationships, my drugs policy, veganism or my living choices. it's all wrong and weird to her
like she doesn't have to understand, but she doesn't have to be judgemental about it

so why i am seeing her? she has a kid, i've promised to be aunt to her and i'm not letting that down
plus with hate you just create more hate, so i'm going there and be all love and peace and understanding and good vibes
but i'm already mentally exhausted about meeting her and if she says a single wrong word about any of my friends, that's it. i'm not going to be her friend anymore ever again

thanks for coming to my ted talk and so on

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wrote:
i wouldn't even want to talk to her again bruh

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kagura wrote:

hamptonthehampster wrote:
i wouldn't even want to talk to her again bruh

yeah, we haven't really even talked after we saw in summer. but she just randomly texted me that her kid asked about me and wants me to visit there. so i guess
for the little one

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kagura wrote:
she has also done some really mean things for me, but i do forgive them. because it was her ex.
and she has said she's sorry about those things and sorry that she took her ex's side. i don't blame her for acting like she did when she was with him. he was very manipulating, violent etc you know.

but that she's still so judgemental and disrespectful years after that relationship.. there's no excuses.
i mean she's still hurt and need therapy after years of living hell, but still. i guess some of this comes from traumas and i try to understand that, but it's hard. because for me it's kinda opposite, because of hard life and seeing so much shit i'm just more understanding and open minded. maybe she'll get there someday
i hope

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