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28 year old dating a 16 year old
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
So, long story short, my friend who RECENTLY turned 16 is actively having sex with this grown-ass man, who knows their age.
Last night my friend and I tried telling the 16-year old how fucking disgusting this man is for continuing their sexual relationship despite them being 16 and him 28, but they cannot get it into their head, they keep defending him. And while I understand what they're going through because I've been through the same when I was 16, it just frustrates me.

Sidenote, the 28-year-old and i's mutual friends have all yelled and screamed at him, that he's disgusting. It seems he literally doesn't care what his friends think of him, either.

Do any of you have any advice? What can we do as friends to get this literal child away from a grown man taking advantage of them?
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 16:04
Private
World Famous



Rotte wrote:
this is when the legal age sucks. 

I have no idea what to do, but i hope you figure it out, because that's not good.
21
Posts: 70329
Date: 18-04-2022 16:09
Alam
World Famous



Alam wrote:
Oh it's definitely gross and bad but if it's legal I don't think there's much you can do. Shaming or patronizing your friend (whether you actually are or they just perceive it that way) is just gonna alienate them, and shaming a creep probably won't make him less of a creep so yeah. Not much to be done.
20
Posts: 23097
Date: 18-04-2022 16:11
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
Angelica wrote:
this is when the legal age sucks. 

I have no idea what to do, but i hope you figure it out, because that's not good.
Exactly! Every time I bring up the fact that we literally all dislike this one 20 year old for dating a 14 year old, they say it's not the same because the 14 year old "is a child" and "they're not a child".

Obviously, I didn't see myself as a child when I was 16 either, but fuck man, 16 year olds are children.
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 16:12
Alam
World Famous



Alam wrote:
hungover wrote:
Angelica wrote:
this is when the legal age sucks. 

I have no idea what to do, but i hope you figure it out, because that's not good.
Exactly! Every time I bring up the fact that we literally all dislike this one 20 year old for dating a 14 year old, they say it's not the same because the 14 year old "is a child" and "they're not a child".

Obviously, I didn't see myself as a child when I was 16 either, but fuck man, 16 year olds are children.
I mean, they're not children, they don't have to be children for it to be wrong, it's still fucked for an adult to mess with a teenager.
20
Posts: 23097
Date: 18-04-2022 16:14
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
Alam wrote:
Oh it's definitely gross and bad but if it's legal I don't think there's much you can do. Shaming or patronizing your friend (whether you actually are or they just perceive it that way) is just gonna alienate them, and shaming a creep probably won't make him less of a creep so yeah. Not much to be done.
It is legal, which is gross to me.

I can't wrap my head around being close to 30 and actively finding someone nearly half your age sexually attractive. We've considered kicking him out of our squat, but at the same time, we don't want to send the 16-year old directly into the arms of him..
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 16:14
Mookid
National Star



mookid wrote:
yeah if its legal theres not much to do.  try to explain to your friend that theyre harming themself in a way they cant see yet but will regret later. if you have experience, try to tell them the fact that u didnt feel like a child at that age but you cant really see things the same way at that age as you will when u get older? and just talking from experience in general. if that doesnt get through to their head then nothing will i guess

//also pulling up some actual studies to show them might be helpful
18
Posts: 527
Date: 18-04-2022 16:15 | Times changed: 1
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
mookid wrote:
yeah if its legal theres not much to do.  try to explain to your friend that theyre harming themself in a way they cant see yet but will regret later. if you have experience, try to tell them the fact that u didnt feel like a child at that age but you cant really see things the same way at that age as you will when u get older? and just talking from experience in general. if that doesnt get through to their head then nothing will i guess

//also pulling up some actual studies to show them might be helpful
My friend and I tried to tell them about our experiences, I distinctively remember us both saying something along the lines of "I didn't feel like a kid, either." But they keep saying that they're not a kid, that they're mature for their age.

Like, the majority of us in our friendgroup are 18+ but we do have some that are below 18, however, I've kinda started feeling a bit icky about my younger friends associating mostly with people in their 20 to 30's? Even though I've done the same since I was 14, there's just a difference between being 18+ and having friends that are in their late twenties, and being 15-16 and having those same friends, in my opinion. I don't know, I'm worried about them.
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 16:21
Private
World Famous



FrutigerAero wrote:
At this point if they love each other theres nothing to do
20
Posts: 26170
Date: 18-04-2022 16:50
Account deleted




wrote:
ew
Date: 18-04-2022 16:51
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
Gengar wrote:
At this point if they love each other theres nothing to do
Huh-
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 16:56
Private
Youtube Star



devilcake wrote:
Blast him on Facebook for dating a child n hope his family disowns him 😔
19
Posts: 193811
Date: 18-04-2022 17:01
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
devilcake wrote:
Blast him on Facebook for dating a child n hope his family disowns him 😔
wait that's not a bad idea LMAO

i'd just risk pushing the 16 year old away from our friendgroup by doing itttttt
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 17:04
Private
Youtube Star



devilcake wrote:
hungover wrote:
devilcake wrote:
Blast him on Facebook for dating a child n hope his family disowns him 😔
wait that's not a bad idea LMAO

i'd just risk pushing the 16 year old away from our friendgroup by doing itttttt
Yeah, it might not be fair on the 16y/o, I always wonder what the close women to these sort of people would think though, like I know some older gens are ver age us just a number 🥰🥰🥰 but I can’t imagine most parents would see their 30 year old son dating a 16 year old and think that’s normal
19
Posts: 193811
Date: 18-04-2022 17:10
Hungover
National Star



hungover wrote:
devilcake wrote:
hungover wrote:
devilcake wrote:
Blast him on Facebook for dating a child n hope his family disowns him 😔
wait that's not a bad idea LMAO

i'd just risk pushing the 16 year old away from our friendgroup by doing itttttt
Yeah, it might not be fair on the 16y/o, I always wonder what the close women to these sort of people would think though, like I know some older gens are ver age us just a number 🥰🥰🥰 but I can’t imagine most parents would see their 30 year old son dating a 16 year old and think that’s normal
Right?
I just feel so powerless.
16
Posts: 3711
Date: 18-04-2022 17:15
Private
National Star



absintjente wrote:
Alam wrote:
hungover wrote:
Angelica wrote:
this is when the legal age sucks. 

I have no idea what to do, but i hope you figure it out, because that's not good.
Exactly! Every time I bring up the fact that we literally all dislike this one 20 year old for dating a 14 year old, they say it's not the same because the 14 year old "is a child" and "they're not a child".

Obviously, I didn't see myself as a child when I was 16 either, but fuck man, 16 year olds are children.
I mean, they're not children, they don't have to be children for it to be wrong, it's still fucked for an adult to mess with a teenager.
per the law in most countries, they are children. anyone under 18 is a child.
21
Posts: 12692
Date: 18-04-2022 22:38
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