bee wrote:
sry vp but
the thing is, the last thing i told him was, i wished we would stay on good terms. and he never replied to that. it was the last communication we had and he chose to leave it with no goodbye. maybe it was the only thing he could do at that time. i do understand that. but still it made me feel like what we had wasnt that important after all, and it broke me. its been 19 months since then. i have not seen any sign of life from him in all that time.. i wonder what he has been up to in all this time. two days ago he posted a picture of his mom and wished a happy mothers day. it was a weird feeling. a confirmation that he is still out there. of course he is, but it never felt like it. he left me and then he was gone. disappeared from the surface. but he is still a real person. i feel that lump in my throat when i think of him. its been so long but i never got closure and i think about it too often. i wish i knew what he thinks of me now. does he ever think of me and remember when what we had was all that mattered. i wish i could talk to him just one last time. like, i really feel like i need to talk to him, fuck. im over him, i dont miss him anymore, i dont have feelings for him. i have so many feelings about how it all ended, it broke me and i never fully healed again. while writing this i am realized the the feeling i have been feeling all this time but never really could put a word on. i feel abandoned
sry vp but
the thing is, the last thing i told him was, i wished we would stay on good terms. and he never replied to that. it was the last communication we had and he chose to leave it with no goodbye. maybe it was the only thing he could do at that time. i do understand that. but still it made me feel like what we had wasnt that important after all, and it broke me. its been 19 months since then. i have not seen any sign of life from him in all that time.. i wonder what he has been up to in all this time. two days ago he posted a picture of his mom and wished a happy mothers day. it was a weird feeling. a confirmation that he is still out there. of course he is, but it never felt like it. he left me and then he was gone. disappeared from the surface. but he is still a real person. i feel that lump in my throat when i think of him. its been so long but i never got closure and i think about it too often. i wish i knew what he thinks of me now. does he ever think of me and remember when what we had was all that mattered. i wish i could talk to him just one last time. like, i really feel like i need to talk to him, fuck. im over him, i dont miss him anymore, i dont have feelings for him. i have so many feelings about how it all ended, it broke me and i never fully healed again. while writing this i am realized the the feeling i have been feeling all this time but never really could put a word on. i feel abandoned