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Hungover
National star



hungover wrote:
ok so
i have bpd, sick, right? I recently got over my old fp (lasted almost 3 years) and I also recently went on a date with this other person, we clicked instantly, and I'm so so so so so scared they're becoming my new fp...

help lol, how do I prevent this shit??? I just want a NORMAL relationship
16
Posts: 3687
Date: 05-10-2022 14:11
Private
Minister of Pop



Arthema wrote:
honestly, I'm just very direct with the people I talk to and tell them about my BPD and everything straight ahead so they'll know, and if they don't I explain it to them
kind of a hassle but making them ready for it really if they are okay with it

it's hard and scary but it's possible to have a healthy relationship, at first it's very fucking shitty and makes you paranoid and scared they won't stay but with good communication, it can be healthy and stable, just that well
easier said than done lol

I had that with my current bf at first (if u see this babe hello LMAO) but I've tried being transparent with him as much as I can with this whole ... thing.. and yeah I think we're at a much better place now thanks to that
17
Posts: 37255
Date: 05-10-2022 14:40
Private
International star



wug wrote:
does fp stand for favourite person 
19
Posts: 107811
Date: 05-10-2022 15:32
Private
National star



absintjente wrote:
Klasifikovany wrote:
does fp stand for favourite person 
yes
21
Posts: 12681
Date: 05-10-2022 15:48
Private
Popstar



Rouya wrote:
ive never been diagnosed with bpd but i used to be very obsessive about people when i was younger and think i can sort of relate. with my current bf there was definitely a rough patch to get through, where i was paranoid, jealous and conflict seeking until i realised that he genuinely cared for me and was able to embrace me as a whole. after that it was like something sort of clicked and i was able to just be myself with him

it took a lot of communication back and forth for a long while and slowly it just got good and we stopped having fights and i stopped being obsessed. i havent felt obsessive about people since and its been 3 years. maybe ill go back to being obsessive about new people if we break up idk but yeah it just took a lot of communication and sticking to it
22
Posts: 9159
Date: 05-10-2022 15:54
Private
Popstar



Rouya wrote:
also just really trying to practice self control and restraint mentally, like not allowing myself to delve into the obsessive thoughts and distracting myself from them when they pop up helped. even though it was/is very difficult to do so, it definitely made a difference
22
Posts: 9159
Date: 05-10-2022 15:56
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
Rouya wrote:
also just really trying to practice self control and restraint mentally, like not allowing myself to delve into the obsessive thoughts and distracting myself from them when they pop up helped. even though it was/is very difficult to do so, it definitely made a difference
Yeah same 
16
Posts: 94813
Date: 05-10-2022 17:00
Private
World famous



Barbarella wrote:
I don't have BPD so I'm not sure if what worked for me would work for you,
but only put as much effort into a friendship as the other person is.

I find when I get overly attached to someone, I'm putting way more work into making them like me than they probably deserve, or want.
20
Posts: 8718
Date: 05-10-2022 17:10
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