(Tw) No longer a tragedy (hopefully) - Forum

Anachronism
National Star

Anachronism wrote:
😊

if you’ve been here for any length of time and know me at all, you will know vp is my personal, public diary in a sense.

you will also know I’ve had a rough go at life. I was raised by a prostitute addict mother, have a host of mental health challenges, used to be a drunk, used to abuse amphetamines, have had abusive boyfriends, have lost jobs, and have struggled financially.

for once in my tumultuous life I think it’s gonna be alright.

almost 3 months ago I thought taking my own life and being a victim of my circumstances was my only answer.

my suicidal thoughts are reducing, I have a possible job after four months of unemployment, I was finally honest about my intrusive thoughts and found out I have ocd which has been fucking empowering, and I don’t hate the ever loving shit out of myself anymore. It’s the first time in my life I have ever felt worthy and deserving of respect. What the hell you guys.

Life fucking sucks and I hate it but it’s also so beautiful.

for once I think I can be something more than just a tragedy who burdens people with my pain and is nothing but a fuck up

you guys

I think I got this

Anachronism
National Star

Anachronism wrote:
I poured my heart out for nothing

Anachronism
National Star

Anachronism wrote:
i kinda lapsed and slept in and blew off therapy and slept all fucking day and just feel like a loser and a failure and self-loathing all fucking over again

that little fucker in my brain who verbally bullies me came back again... it's basically this:

Bojack Horseman - Stupid Piece of sh*t - YouTube

but it's a whole new day.. still like fucking garbage and so much fear and dread and frustration and anger at my employment and financial situation but Imma persevere

Private
World Famous

Rotte wrote:
I am rooting for you!