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Helper
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General < General
No offense to anyone
LexiLuvsKirby
Youtube star



But why does it seem like everyone who has a kid loses every other personality trait except that damn baby?
Like I knew a girl who had so much personality and now literally ALL she does is talk about her baby. I understand she's proud of her kid and it's her whole world yadda yadda but seriously that's like the main reason I'm never having kids. I don't want to lose myself.
Private
World famous



I have two friends with kids, one of them gave birth to her second 3 weeks ago. Thankfully they didn't change after having children but I can imagine that happening to some people. Some parents just makes their child their whole personality and it's kinda sad. Worst ones are those who try to bring the children EVERYWHERE. Like drinking with friends, parties etc.
Fujiwara
International star



my sister has 4 kids and she is 21. when we was an early teen (12-15) she was very misbehaved and we had to call the police to our house twice for her. when she had her kids, she actually grew up and became a wonderful person and she is so pleasant to know and be around. i have always got along well with my sister but the people that didnt before, now really like her and talk to her
Account deleted




my sister became a mom 3 years ago and she's still very much herself tbh..Ā 

maybe she's just excited to talk about her kid, after all it's become a very big part of her life and since it probably takes up a lot of her time that might be the only thing she can have a conversation about
OceanWitch
Popstar



i've noticed that too and don't want kids for the same reason. i like who i am without kids, and personally i think some people aren't cut out to be parents and that's okay.
Private
Youtube star



i genuinely fear this will happen when people in my life start having kids, or like that getting to spend time with them without the child will never happen... im sure it vm depends on the person, tho i think its also probably hard not to spend all ur time talking about a child when its prolly taking up like 89% of ur time now
Private
International star



Stupot wrote:
my sister became a mom 3 years ago and she's still very much herself tbh..Ā 

maybe she's just excited to talk about her kid, after all it's become a very big part of her life and since it probably takes up a lot of her time that might be the only thing she can have a conversation about
yeah. it's not that different from people who make their job, hobbies etc their "whole personality". those people likely have more to offer than just, ex. the baby, it's just a very important and time-consuming aspect of their life at the moment. i don't think you "lose yourself" once you have kids; your priorities etc just change as you evolve as a person (and, just to be clear, people without kids also evolve in such manner). i don't think once you become a parent you turn into this one-dimensional caricature of yourself
Private
National star



there's people whose sole purpose for having a child is to give themselves a sense of identity (becoming a parent as a way to be someone)
Private
Living legend



some people might do, but i think its more just that priorities changeĀ 
and also that other people expect them to stay the exact same after parenthood, which is an unrealistic expectation
the same can also be said for people who get obsessed with something and only talk about that too, theres nothing wrong with that, people can just changeĀ 
Private
Living legend



Sera wrote:
Stupot wrote:
my sister became a mom 3 years ago and she's still very much herself tbh..Ā 

maybe she's just excited to talk about her kid, after all it's become a very big part of her life and since it probably takes up a lot of her time that might be the only thing she can have a conversation about
yeah. it's not that different from people who make their job, hobbies etc their "whole personality". those people likely have more to offer than just, ex. the baby, it's just a very important and time-consuming aspect of their life at the moment. i don't think you "lose yourself" once you have kids; your priorities etc just change as you evolve as a person (and, just to be clear, people without kids also evolve in such manner). i don't think once you become a parent you turn into this one-dimensional caricature of yourself
you explained this much better than i did, yes this is what i meantĀ 
Account deleted




Sera wrote:
Stupot wrote:
my sister became a mom 3 years ago and she's still very much herself tbh..Ā 

maybe she's just excited to talk about her kid, after all it's become a very big part of her life and since it probably takes up a lot of her time that might be the only thing she can have a conversation about
yeah. it's not that different from people who make their job, hobbies etc their "whole personality". those people likely have more to offer than just, ex. the baby, it's just a very important and time-consuming aspect of their life at the moment. i don't think you "lose yourself" once you have kids; your priorities etc just change as you evolve as a person (and, just to be clear, people without kids also evolve in such manner). i don't think once you become a parent you turn into this one-dimensional caricature of yourself
100%! and in some cases you don't evolve even after having kids, so I don't think having kids is necessarily the cause, it's just a person's tendency to fixate on one certain aspect of their life
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