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LexiLuvsKirby wrote:
and family knew how bad things were in my head
I wish they could understand why I don't reply to texts much anymore
and I know they don't wonder why I never text first
But I wish they all knew how much I hurt when nobody checks on me
Not for days, weeks, months
Just ever.
I wish I was able to want to hang out with people the few times in invited to something
But I don't want to hang out with anyone
I can't be me when people are around, I have to pretend to be normal so it's really not fun to hang out with people or go anywhere with them
I wish I could just say "hey just so you know I'm a really bad person and I will probably ruin every aspect of your life until you get rid of me, but don't worry or feel bad when you have to let go, it happens to everyone I meet" just so they know what they're getting into at the start and they'll leave right away so when it happens it doesn't hurt so bad
I wish waking up in the morning felt like a new opportunity and not a punishment for yesterday
I wish I could smile again and I wish I could make others smile, like my family and friends
But I only hurt them so I just want to run away and never be heard of again
and family knew how bad things were in my head
I wish they could understand why I don't reply to texts much anymore
and I know they don't wonder why I never text first
But I wish they all knew how much I hurt when nobody checks on me
Not for days, weeks, months
Just ever.
I wish I was able to want to hang out with people the few times in invited to something
But I don't want to hang out with anyone
I can't be me when people are around, I have to pretend to be normal so it's really not fun to hang out with people or go anywhere with them
I wish I could just say "hey just so you know I'm a really bad person and I will probably ruin every aspect of your life until you get rid of me, but don't worry or feel bad when you have to let go, it happens to everyone I meet" just so they know what they're getting into at the start and they'll leave right away so when it happens it doesn't hurt so bad
I wish waking up in the morning felt like a new opportunity and not a punishment for yesterday
I wish I could smile again and I wish I could make others smile, like my family and friends
But I only hurt them so I just want to run away and never be heard of again
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