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General < General
post break up advice?
Doll
Popstar



Doll wrote:
long read but any help is appreciated 

long story short my ex broke up with me because he got exhausted by how i managed my mental health and he said that he feels affection for me but not romantically anymore because of how bad and tired he feels
this break up was the worst hit to my mental health and it completely deteriorated and my parents finally agreed to let me get therapy and i am just so frustrated that it took me to get broken up with for them to let me get help
and while a win is a win i feel so hurt and sad and just lost.
i lost the person dearest to me and now i can get help the irony of fate

though me and him decided to try and be friends for now and yesterday we hung out as friends for a bit it was very awkward but it gradually got less awkward but still awkward 

we also decided that we would see if in the future we can try again though he said he really is against a relationship with me but he is open to his feelings changing

this was all before my parents agreed to letting me get therapy. i haven't told him yet because i am thinking if i should tell him for a chance IN THE FUTURE to try again after i have started working on my bs. or if i should just tell him i am starting therapy and let time play its part. 
i am so anxious and sad all the time. i really want to ask him to try again once i start therapy and have gone a couple times. but i don't know how he will take that because i don't want to pressure him either

plz help
15
Posts: 1388
Date: 05-10-2026 09:23
Private
Prince of Pop



Azriel wrote:
Maybe you could text him once you feel like therapy has actually helped you and you "manage your mental health" better
20
Posts: 40431
Date: 05-10-2026 12:00
Private
International Star



meilin wrote:
oh wow, i'm so sorry to hear that this happened, especially since it sounded like you were really trying your best in this relationship ):

how do you feel about being friends with him? i'm doing the same with my ex who i broke up with 3(?) weeks ago and we had to set up some boundaries to make it work.

glad your parents actually got you to therapy or like, are in the process of getting you there, but i agree that it's quite... not okay that it took something like this to happen to make them recognize something is wrong and that the "damage" already got done in your relationship before you were able to get help.

i wouldn't tell him right away that you've started therapy, because i could see how that might come across as a little "bid" for the lost connection with him, but i also don't think it would be terrible if you would tell him. maybe later on could work, like casually "yeah, my therapist said that too" or "oh yeah, sorry, i can't at time x, i have therapy", if it becomes relevant in the conversation naturally? and then if he wants to know more, he can ask? ideally he would ofc see the gradual improvements himself but yeah. i can definitely see why you would want to tell him bc i would too, in your situation

i wish you all the best in this process<3 dealing with mental health problems while recovering from a breakup can be incredibly hard
18
Posts: 13937
Date: 05-10-2026 12:10
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