FT: Losing a loved one - Forum

FT: Losing a loved one

Pitbull
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Pitbull wrote:

Good evening y'all
I think we've all lost someone at some point in our life. Wether or not its family or a friend, perhaps even a pet.
When was the last time you lost someone? How did you deal with the grief?

Private
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Ahria wrote:
I can’t remember the last time I lost a loved one
Maybe my grandma counts but I barely knew her because I don’t see relatives often so I didn’t really get sad

i think I’m lucky in that sense

Account deleted

wrote:
The most recent person I lost was my grandfather on my mother's side. It's a few years ago now, but I still miss him. He was such a good, grounded person. Thinking about everything he went through - from being a kid under ww2 and having nazis on their farm to building the cottage we have in our family today and taking care of so much as long as he could, despite illnesses for many years - I'm left with admiration.

I cried a bunch in his funeral. To be honest, I cried from the moment I entered the church to the moment it was over and we sat in the car. It was on my birthday, and that was a particularly weird week since I went from that to a soccer tournament as well. However, the thing that always stands out to me about his death was that I was so sure he would die the day he died a week before (he was sick previously to it) and when it happened, I was all about 'how can I support my mother? She lost her father, which to me would be one of the hardest losses to go through.' I remember I tried to console her long before I let myself cry over it. I remember sitting beside him on the hospital 4 days before, battling my ugly crying so hard I couldn't tell him I loved him. I regret that so much.

When my family talks about good things and memories about him, I still cry, but there are so many experiences between that one and where I am now, it's easy to live with on a daily basis.

^ to prove my statement I'm totally crying over writing this

Account deleted

wrote:
the last time i lost some1 was in may this year
he was one of my mum's exes but he knew us and my mom was still best friends with him since he was a wonderful soul, he helped us through tough times and was one of the saviors to be honest
he died from lungcancer, he had been smoking cigs since he was 15 and he died at the age of 64 or so
i couldn't believe it when we got the news, i had just gotten summer break from school and my mom wrote me that a person had called and told he died from cancer, i had to check the message like 10 times to actually understand what it was about, because i refused to believe it at first
i was on my way home and when i got home i just started to cry uncontrollably, it was really sad and it felt and still is a huge loss to every1 who knew him
to be honest you just have to continue living ur life, because people don't come back from being dead u know, so yeah i've cried lots, but i also understand that he would've wanted that we live on and remember the good moments we had with him, since that's what counts
this year hasn't been easy at all, he wasn't the only one we lost this year + some days ago we almost lost another person as well
but yeah i can't let myself enter the dark hole, because i have to live my life and move on, grieving is something we all do, but as i mentioned, i can't let it get to me or else i'd be rly miserable

Olinisfinis
Streetmusician

olinisfinis wrote:
i lost my great grandma on dads side last sunday and i lost my dad 3 years ago.
my grandma was old and sick.. so we were just waiting for her time to come, she died at the age of 95 years old. even if she was old, it was really hard to get the news. but i know she's in a better place without the pain

my dad died in suicide. i got the news when i was in school.. it felt like a piece of my heart was torn out.
but i know he's also in a better place without all of this pain, but i miss him everyday.. so much.

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Fillory wrote:
I lost my grandpa last year and my grandma this year, we weren't so close but I have some good memories. It hurt when they passed but it was time, they were both very ill for a long period of time so I'm glad they can finally rest.

Laboratory
World famous

Laboratory wrote:
Most recent loss was my great grandpa, but that 1 wasn't as harsh on me as when my dad died for instance...,, I mean the man was old as hell and sick, it was very clear that he'd lived a long, happy and 'complete' life so that one wasn't 'bad', idk, i kinda feel like I skipped grief and just jumped into acceptance with that 1.
The worst part about him being gone is really my great grandma being left alone,,, I can't imagine how hard it must be for her. She started drinking heavily when my great grandpa got sick so I'm almost certain she's drinking even more now.

Chalya
International star

Chalya wrote:
I lost my mother when I was near 7yo, I don't remember much about her, I recall mostly the negative side tdh. But still, I miss her and I don't think that I've get over it since she passed. I do have some serious mommy issues that I need to review with a psychologist.
Luckily for me my father embraced both the "mom" AND "dad" role at perfection, he was always there for me and he still is, I love him so much and I'm proud to be his daughter! He didn't wanted me to have a step mother and for him to deal with another female that might show her "crazy" side AFTER the wedding day (like my mother lmao). And ofc, I love her too ♥

Private
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YSL wrote:
i lost my father september 21st this year
it happened very sudden and i am still not over it. he was my favorite person in this world. i miss him so much ❤️

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gothprincess wrote:
I lost my step uncle bobby back in 2010 and it heart so bad cause cause I moved from Ohio to new york to be with my real mom so I only new him for 1 year and I was so close to him and then I lost my grandma I called nana bear back in 2016 she was in her 70s she was so sweet and kind to almost every one she passed away on on April 21 she died on hwr anniversary i miss her so much the last gift she got me be for she died was bunk beds cause I needed a new bed and I still have them I use them and her name was Abigail but she went by gail

Laboratory
World famous

Laboratory wrote:
this thread is gonna be so heavy oml I can already feel the sobs

Private
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Azriel wrote:
The last time I lost a loved one was when I was 6 and like i cried once back then but that couldve been bc it was all so depressing

Inudi
World famous

Inudi wrote:
I almost lost the same family member twice. I got so scared both times, and the last time it happened i felt depressed and confused. I cried a lot, but not anymore. But it still affects me a lot when i randomly remember it during the day....

And then there was another family member that died when i was 10, and i i didn't understand until the moment they drove her away in the hearse, and then i cried for 10 minutes.

December
World famous

December wrote:
the last time i lost someone was my oldest cat, he passed away like almost exactly a year ago, it was a year ago november 3rd. i cried so much during the first days, but not as much as i thought because it also was a relief. he was old, skinny and very slow and he had been like that for months and got worse and worse.

it was good timing since my sister visited which she only does for like holidays, so i'm glad she also got to say goodbye, it's almost like our cat waited for her before he could let go. we all surrounded him and told him how much we love him. he had been in my life since i was like 3. i feel bad for my 10 year old cat, i think he isses him. we have another cat now that we got like two months before, but they don't like each other that much, i wonder what y cat thinks happened to james (that was our cats name, in swedish, jam is like meowing so we pronounced it differenty lol)

i didn't go to the funeral of my cat cuz just knowing i'd be sitting in a car for like almost an hour with him in like the backseat or something and the thought of that is just the worst thing ever. i still feel guilt for not going.

Account deleted

wrote:
i lost my grandmother and uncle when i was 7 and i recently lost my grandfather like 4 weeks ago

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Rotte wrote:
I lost my great grandmother in 2016, i didn't deal good at all in the moment. She was in her 90's and had in 2013/14 fallen and ended in a nursing home.
I got told when i got home one evening that she was in the hospital and was dying. Me and my mom decided to go to the hospital and pick up my brother on the way.
On the way to my brother we got a told that she died and never have i felt such pain in my heart. We told my brother when we meet him and we stood crying at a parking lot at midnight.
We choose to go there anyways and i saw her dead and it was honestly the hardest thing ever. I'm not sure if I'm happy i saw here like that, it made it all really real and the last memory i now have from her is her in the hospital bed.
The moment after i didn't really have anyone to talk to and i would sit in class and cry if the least just reminded me of her.
I'm more okay now, but honestly i cried about writing this. It's hard knowing someone ain't gonna be there anymore and u can't go see them, play cards with them and hear their silly jokes.
She was the kindest and coolest great grandmother i know, she was very social and would complain when her scooter wasn't fast enough. U always saw her with a beer and a cigarette in her hand.. She was everyone's sunshine. And with that me an mom in 2018 each got a sun tattooed as a forever reminder about her positivity and love

Sorry this was so long and depressing

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