theAmanda and Alaskasweet (RP) - Forum

theAmanda and Alaskasweet (RP)

TheAmanda
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theAmanda wrote:
She wanted to laugh, because, in her ears it sounded absurd. He had trained all his life, he probably didn't even remember having a life outside the Jedi temple. How could his master not mention the trials to him? He was near the age when many padawans took a step towards being a real master. Her own master had told her about them, never claiming that she would take them in the near future but to make her prepare for the possible future. If he wasn't ready for the Jedi Trials yet then.... then when would she be? She didn't laugh. She just looked at him, totally suprised. She then frowned a bit and shook her head.

"You won't fail. You should know that... even if your Master says it you will prove him wrong." Even if everyone said that he wouldn't be able to do it, she would always believe in him. He maybe thought of her as wierd and even unreasonable with all her thoughts... but sometimes they did her good. Corinne saw a door that looked like a one to another guestroom. This was probably the one she would stay in. She smiled a bit to finally arrived but a part of her wanted their walk to never end but as in every fairytail they ended. She just had to remember that she wasn't a part of one.

"I will change into something more... proper and... cleaner to wear. Do you want to wait or do we met up were we will met the Queen? She probably wants us to do the assignment as soon as possible."

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan nodded in agreement and he thought for a moment. Their masters are still most likely catching up with lost time so he said, "I think it would be right of me to escort you there," he showed her a brief inviting smile. Maybe it was something she had said to alter his mood, He had been feeling down lately, feeling as if he was not good enough for anything so that would make him work extra hard and focus twice as hard, maybe that is what his father has wanted. He has wanted Kilan to look at himself as a failure so that he would do everything in his power to prevent himself from failing, it was a cruel plan, to make Kilan think of himself so low. But it had worked. Kilan thought that all he was ever to do was gain his father's trust and respect back, but maybe Corinne was correct. Maybe he was ready for the jedi trials and his own master was holding him back, but why? Why wouldn't he want to see his padewan, his own son, succeed. After all the hard work and training it just did not seem fair or right. Kilan deserved better didn't he?

He was lost in thought as he waited for her to dress herself. He began to think about something that has never dared cross his mind in all his years. All this change, old feelings, and new discovery has left him wondering something dangerous. Something that no jedi should ever think. What would it be like to not have become a jedi. His whole life he has dedicated himself to this, but he was born into it. He has seen no other life for himself so he has never had a decision he has been free to make. Now he is not complaining about being a jedi He has done much good and he has always taken pride in saving lives. But he is starting to see so much of his hard work is backfiring. He is being treated poorly, like his own father is using him. Him seeing Corinne here today, yes she is confused but she still is a free spirit, she chose this destiny, but what has Kilan ever chose? He has not chose anything, because he never got the chance. After all this wondering and realizing he was not sure about a lot, but he was sure that he would always remain a jedi. It does make him feel pride. But he must start choosing paths for himself, he much search ahead instead of letting his master make him dwell on the past. He is certain about this thought.

TheAmanda
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theAmanda wrote:
Corinne opened the door to the guestroom and went inside. She looked behind her at Kilan and smiledat him as a respons. Her old self would have counted on him still being outside when she came back, that someone would help her, but now? Her master never helped her more then he needed to. To be correct, he didn't help her at all. She had become more independet over these years then she thought. She had come up with ideas that were clever and made brave actions. Her younger self would never defended anyone. Her younger self would have ran away, trying to hide from every existing shadow. She wasn't like that anymore. She was who she always wanted to be.

"Thank you, Kilan." The light that came from the room almost blinded her but after a few seconds her eyes got used to all the white colours. She looked around in the room. It was a beautiful room with great windows. You could see the lakes and the mountains in the horizan. The room was nothing what she was used to.. this wasn't really only one room. This was more like an apartment. She normaly slept in a room that only had one bed. This guestroom had a sofa, a table, decorations, a fireplace, a bed, a kitchen, a bathroom and a wardrobe. She could go on all day naming everything that existed there.

Corrine could stay there all day but she knew that she was needed elsewhere and that Kilan was waiting for her. She was going to shower fast and then change clothes. She walked towards the wardrobe and looked inside. To her suprise everything there were outfits that she could wear. She stood there frozen for a moment. She expected her extra padawan uniform to be there, not an collection from Alderaan. How did they know her size? She touched one of the dresses. She had never seen such a fabric. When would she have time to wear them? Would she be able to wear them? There were everything from evening gowns to training clothes. How long did they think they would stay here? Were this something more then just one mission? Corinne took out something that looked like something a padawan would wear. It was a pair of light brown pants, a white undershirt and a brown armless jacket. She took of the belt she had around her waist. This could work but she knew that her master would think that the tight pants were a bit to show. The padawan clothes hadn't anything that showed the body lines. She knew these pants would show off her long legs and that the armless jacket would show more skinn that she was used to. She had however no chose. She sighed and headed to the shower.

Alaskasweet
Streetmusician

Alaskasweet wrote:
Kilan knew that this realization was directly from Corinne's presence. He did not necessarily consider it a bad thing, but he knew that if he followed this logic, this could lead to a lot of conflict with his father. He might even be reassigned to a new master, even after all his father put him through. He has been the only so called, "family," he has had in many years, his mother has been assigned in Kamino and he has not traveled there since he was a mere boy. Yes they were not like a normal family. Families weren't for jedis. And though his father does not understand what happened that day, that he treats him like a future failure because of the past. He is grateful for his father in his life. If he was to go on to the jedi trials. They might have to move on and part after that. That could possibly be the reasoning for him to put off such an event. Kilan did not understand the exact reasoning, but if that was the case the he sure did understand.

He was really caught in between decisions he did not know if he should either come right out to his father and say that he needs to find his own path, move on to the trials. And prove himself as a true jedi. May become a well known master like his father. That legacy defines him, since the moment that he was born he was .. not trapped, but subjected to this life. He would never dream of complaining of being such a great and powerful individual. But to be still very torn at this stage shows that everything is not as defined as he once thought. He cannot spend his entire life trying to prove himself to his father. His father most know that as well, his father was fighting the inevitable. They were to be split up in the future and that will be something he will have to prepare for. If he did not tell his father this then he would be stuck not achieving his full potential or greatness. He does not want that, he wants to continue the legacy not live in the shadows, he wants to do memorable things. Now if he was to sit down with his father and explain all these realizations it could go two ways, his father could see how he ha been effecting Kilan, maybe feel some remorse. Maybe he would agree to send him to jedi travels after the mission. He could possibly let Kilan move on and become a great jedi master, or he could get angry for independent thinking. He may find it as an outburst of disobedience, there could be more tension between them, and he may treat him worse than before, and may never look at him with pride. Never look at him with the pride that Kilan truly feels.

Kilan returned from his deep thinking to realize that Corinne is taking a while getting ready, he slightly smiled at that, she really was the true opposite of him, she was a free spirit, her own individual, and she was.. late. She was not prompt, like he was programmed to be. But honestly at this point he did not care, he wanted to escort her. It was proper, so if his master frowns upon their tardiness then so be it. He always told Kilan to treat guests and new people with the upmost respect for they are our allies and we do not want to disrespect such important people. So in his mind he is only doing what he was trained to do whether his master saw it that way or not.

TheAmanda
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theAmanda wrote:
Sorry for not answering. I have had so much to do. :c
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Instead of looking like a living pile of sand she now looked like she had just jumped into a sea and climbed out of it. Then again, she had dry clothes which was the difference between jumping into a sea and take a shower. She hadn't had the time to get her skinn all that dry. She had braided her hair to not let it get to stick to her back, she did want to look like she had tried to look like she had time to fix her looks before she met the Queen. She had her clothes on and as she stepped out of the door she put on her belt around her waist.

She looked up on Kilan. He was probably angry but didn't want to show it. She felt so ashamed. Why did she had to crawl on the ground during her former mission? She really needed to priority... or... no. She was proud of what she had done. The Queen had to accept that she was that kind of person and she did her best. Kilan had to accept that too.. if he did accept her. She looked at him for a short second. Was he disappointed at who she had become?

"I'm so sorry, Kilan. I tried to hurry but the sand where... everywhere." She wanted to shake just to get the thought of sand away. She started to walk and smiled brightly at him.
"So, do you know what awaits us? I mean... your master maybe said more about the mission we're about to get in the middle of."

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