Seeing a therapist, shrink, psychologist or whatever else you like to call it is a commonly misunderstood experience and because of that, I'm going to try explain and correct some preconceived ideas that people commonly have about therapy. (Note: This news piece is focusing on seeing a therapist NOT a psychiatrist. Those are two different terms altogether and some of the things mentioned in this article will not relate to psychiatry. Thanks!)

Myth: Having a therapist is like paying for a friend
Your therapist is not your friend. The relationship you have with your therapist is one that stays within the boundaries of the walls of the room you talk in. You will not be having sleepovers with them, you will not go out for a coffee, or take them shopping with you and you won't be going to the movies for a night out with your shrink. Your therapist is a source of support and that is what you a paying for. A good connection is ideal, but this does not mean that you are their friend. Careers require professional masks; a facade put on for the job. The "John" who supports in therapy is different from the "John" that lives his life out of work and due to the boundaries of the relationship, you only interact with the therapist John.

Myth: Seeing a therapist means that you are weak, mentally ill, or crazy.

 Despite popular belief, therapy is not selectively for the mentally ill. People who are mentally ill can be sent to a therapist for a certain type of treatment (CBT, DBT) but that does not mean that you have to be sick to see someone. Sometimes you just need support; you may have friendship problems, relationship problems, home problems or school problems or whatever else. Personal anecdote time: When I was in 10th grade I booked myself to see a counselor because I was struggling with study. I wasn't seeing her due to a flaw or a weakness, I just needed some guidance and advice. On the contrary being able to seek help for yourself is a sign of maturity and self awareness.

Myth: Therapy is passive

Everywhere, seeing a therapist is depicted as a scenario where you lay on a couch and confess your problems to an old man with a cigar who merely nods with the occasional "Hmm". In reality, it is actually the opposite. You do express your worries, yes, but you are not made to lie down and instead of just nodding, your shrink will respond to your words, expressing thoughts, clarifying ideas and offering suggestions and possible solutions. Therapy is a two way process about YOU where you and your psych work TOGETHER to deal with whatever ails you. 

Myth: If I go see a shrink, they will just give me pills. 

Doctors give you pills. Psychiatrists give you pills. A therapist is not qualified to give you medication. If they feel that you really need it, they may send you to someone who can give you medication but generally, a shrink will not use a tablet as the ultimate solution, they prefer to talk about things rather than hand out meds.

Myth: If you don’t start feeling better straightaway, the therapy is ineffective. 

There is no easy way out of solving your troubles and that applies to counselling as well.Your therapist doesn't have all of the answers and they are not handing you a get-out-of-jail-free-pass to avoid your problems. You are important and your troubles take time to pull through. You can't expect a a quick-fix to emotional struggles and this is due to no fault of your, or the therapist. It is just a part of life that takes patience and time but as well, feeling better is influenced by other factors: your emotional mind and its strength, frequency of the sessions, the quality of the therapist (some are better than others) and your capability to participate in the sessions. 

Myth: It is not a good idea to change therapists. 

Incorrect. Therapists are people too and we all have those individuals in our lives who we JUST DON'T like, for whatever reason and no matter how hard we try, we never seem to be able to connect with these people. This can be the case with a psychologist that you see. Like teachers, they are all different and because of this, you may not get along well with him or her. This means that your well-being will struggle to improve if you are having sessions with someone you don't like. Many people refuse to see anyone because they generalize their bad experience to all shrinks. Another personal anecdote for you: I have seen over different 5 psychologists. Seems like a waste of time and money but I now see one that I work well with and it is worth the time. Back to the point. Therapy is about YOU. Don't put yourself through crap when you can have better.

Myth: Therapy is all about “happy thoughts”

This is untrue UNLESS you are seeing a positive psychologist. A therapist isn't paid to praise you, to deny all of your flaws and to sugarcoat the truth. A good psych won't sit there and tell you silly advice like "drink more water and you'll have more friends" or "you have problems because you listen to heavy metal". A good therapist won't say "think happy thoughts". Instead, they may challenge your perceptions or question your feelings or motives to get to a solution.

Myth: Everyone will know I’m getting help!

Will they? Are you planning to tell them? Did you make a status about it of Facebook? Was your latest tweet "Off 2 see the psychhhh brb #ugh #psych #problems #fml"? People will only know if you (or if a family member) tell them. A psychologist is legally not allowed to share your information to anyone - exceptions: if you are under 18 they can tell your parents things (but they don't always and you can discuss this with your psych) and if you share anything that may put you or someone else at risk, they have to alert someone to the fact - but other than that, what you say remains in the walls of the room.