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| First Broken Love - Writing |
| You were my first love and essentially my everything. I would have gone to the ends of the earth for you. I was putty in your hands because I was so vulnerable in love with you. Loving you made me crazy. Not in a bad way; in a beautiful, earth-shattering way. It made me experience feelings that I didn’t even know were possible. I never knew I could feel so deeply for another person until you came into my life. And then you broke my heart. You crushed it and left me with scars that will never fully go away. In the beginning, I didn’t think I would be able to make it through the heartbreak. It was the worst pain I’d ever felt. It was like you had driven me out into a desert, told me I was worthless and then drove away, leaving me there to starve and die on my own. I was absolutely terrified. Everything that I knew about my future and myself was shattered. I barely knew who I was anymore. I couldn’t even properly function, reducing myself to a hysterical mess on my couch for three days straight. Everyone kept saying to me “time heals all wounds.” At first, I just couldn’t bring myself to believe them. But after a while, I started to feel like they might be right. I observed many of my friends who had been abruptly been broken up with just like me and they were all doing fine now. I began to feel... to feel a sense of hope that I might be doing fine one day as well. And now I am. It’s still a work in progress and I still feel pain sometimes, but I see the light at the end of this very dark tunnel. So I just want to thank you for breaking my heart. If you hadn’t, I wouldn’t know what it’s like to hit rock bottom and then pick myself up from there. If I didn’t know how it feels to reach my lowest point, I wouldn’t fully understand how strong I am and how much resilience I possess. Thank you for breaking off our relationship because now I know that I am worth so much more than what you were willing to give me. Know I can see what I want in a man and what I don’t want. I will look for someone who truly comprehends how special I am and someone who values me way more than you ever did. Thank you for crushing me. Now I realize that I had lost myself in you. |
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