scoff wrote:
Dear fuckhead,
You're twelve years old, and you wish to die. You're not gonna try it, because you're way too afraid, but you're gonna use it to your advantage, as in, you're going to tell everybody about your thoughts, and you're going to threaten them with your wish to die at whatever moment you think suits, all because you want something that you won't ever get. You're twelve years old, and you hate your statue. You're short, and you're fattening up. Your grandma enlightens you. 'Do you eat candy every day?', she asks. 'No', you lie. 'I don't'. You dream about becoming a teenager, bleach your hair to the point of disaster, wear too much makeup, and hang around with the popular girls.
And so you do. You're thirteen. You've bleached your hair to destruction, and you hang out with the popular girls. You hate it, because it all kicks back on you. People talk, you don't know them, but they know you. You start dreaming about something else instead - you're going to blend in, you're going to focus on school, get good grades, get somewhere in life. And so you dye your hair brown, you wash off your makeup, and you start putting effort into school.
You hate it. You start dreaming about going to parties and fucking boys instead. And at fifteen, that's what you do, more or less. It has you anxious, you don't know how to deal with it. At sixteen, you dream of poetry, nights awake with wine as your only company, surrounding yourself with art and music. So, you do just that. And then you change. You don't want it anymore. You want rock n roll, you want disaster.
So you go out and get it. And you regret it.
And here you are now, nineteen, and you dream of settling down. Fancy dinners with rose wine, maybe a child or two. A house, not too far from town, but still on the country side of things. Marriage.
Don't go get that, nath. You'll regret it, and having a child and regretting it would be nothing less than a pure disaster.
If you get pregnant, have an abortion.
Have an abortion.
Have an abortion.
Have an abortion.
I don't know a lot about life as of yet, but if there is one thing I know about myself, it's that when I want something, and I get that something, then I don't want it anymore.