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Why are people like this
Private
World famous



Saekki wrote:
Kit wrote:
Saekki wrote:
I shared my frustration that it kinda hurt and asked if he then expected me to go buy groceries, cook & clean and he was kinda like "well, you're probably not as tired as i am after this"

this is gatekeeping, he's downplaying your feelings and he clearly doesn't care what you think since he's putting his needs and feelings higher than yours. You would have been just as tired since you were supposed to go with him and I bet he would have the same mentality if you both went. 
wait do u mean gaslighting ? or am i misunderstanding the term gatekeeping 
ooohh i might have mixed those two up sorry
19
Posts: 11668
Date: 14-10-2020 11:31
Kit
National star



Kit wrote:
Saekki wrote:
Kit wrote:
Saekki wrote:
I shared my frustration that it kinda hurt and asked if he then expected me to go buy groceries, cook & clean and he was kinda like "well, you're probably not as tired as i am after this"

this is gatekeeping, he's downplaying your feelings and he clearly doesn't care what you think since he's putting his needs and feelings higher than yours. You would have been just as tired since you were supposed to go with him and I bet he would have the same mentality if you both went. 
wait do u mean gaslighting ? or am i misunderstanding the term gatekeeping 
ooohh i might have mixed those two up sorry
hkjkfd they sound v similar nd are both shitty things to do so i also am not sure oops
19
Posts: 12912
Date: 14-10-2020 11:33
Pitbull
Popstar



Pitbull wrote:
Kit wrote:
Saekki wrote:
I shared my frustration that it kinda hurt and asked if he then expected me to go buy groceries, cook & clean and he was kinda like "well, you're probably not as tired as i am after this"

this is gatekeeping, he's downplaying your feelings and he clearly doesn't care what you think since he's putting his needs and feelings higher than yours. You would have been just as tired since you were supposed to go with him and I bet he would have the same mentality if you both went. 
wait do u mean gaslighting ? or am i misunderstanding the term gatekeeping 
Gatekeeping is like when some ppl in a community decides on who can enter versus who cannot i believe. 
18
Posts: 11412
Date: 14-10-2020 11:39
Private
World famous



Saekki wrote:
no matter the term

he still seems to think that he matters more, it's very weird to revoke your invitation to something you both were gonna do just because you would be an uneven number. 

It's also not okay that he doesn't acknowledge your frustration over it AND expects you to do household chores that you both were gonna do since "now you have free time since you're not invited anymore and i'm gonna be so tired bu hu"
19
Posts: 11668
Date: 14-10-2020 11:39
Pitbull
Popstar



Pitbull wrote:
Saekki wrote:
no matter the term

he still seems to think that he matters more, it's very weird to revoke your invitation to something you both were gonna do just because you would be an uneven number. 

It's also not okay that he doesn't acknowledge your frustration over it AND expects you to do household chores that you both were gonna do since "now you have free time since you're not invited anymore and i'm gonna be so tired bu hu"
well im def not going to it now. I decided to just stay home w. Alfred tonight instead hopefully to set an example that I'm not putting up with it.
18
Posts: 11412
Date: 14-10-2020 11:44
Private
World famous



Saekki wrote:
Escobar wrote:
Saekki wrote:
no matter the term

he still seems to think that he matters more, it's very weird to revoke your invitation to something you both were gonna do just because you would be an uneven number. 

It's also not okay that he doesn't acknowledge your frustration over it AND expects you to do household chores that you both were gonna do since "now you have free time since you're not invited anymore and i'm gonna be so tired bu hu"
well im def not going to it now. I decided to just stay home w. Alfred tonight instead hopefully to set an example that I'm not putting up with it.
please do, i hope you'll have a nice calm day
19
Posts: 11668
Date: 14-10-2020 11:47
Private
World famous



DEITY wrote:
Escobar wrote:
Saekki wrote:
no matter the term

he still seems to think that he matters more, it's very weird to revoke your invitation to something you both were gonna do just because you would be an uneven number. 

It's also not okay that he doesn't acknowledge your frustration over it AND expects you to do household chores that you both were gonna do since "now you have free time since you're not invited anymore and i'm gonna be so tired bu hu"
well im def not going to it now. I decided to just stay home w. Alfred tonight instead hopefully to set an example that I'm not putting up with it.
yea honestly just focus on urself n alfred rn, just treat urself ur bf dont deserve ur energy at all rn
21
Posts: 22397
Date: 14-10-2020 11:47
Pitbull
Popstar



Pitbull wrote:
ok this day keeps getting worse

1. I'm having a migraine attack
2. I dropped a glass of olives in the grocery store and im embarrassed dwhdwefw
18
Posts: 11412
Date: 14-10-2020 15:38
MissLondon
Queen of Queens



MissLondon wrote:
I'd probably be pissed, go grocery shopping 
and then chat him up while I'm preparing dinner. 
I'd pour myself a nice glass of wine and enjoy a meal for one. 
If he questioned the single serving, my response would be, "I thought you would be too tired to eat"
20
Posts: 27725
Date: 14-10-2020 15:48
Pitbull
Popstar



Pitbull wrote:
MissLondon wrote:
I'd probably be pissed, go grocery shopping 
and then chat him up while I'm preparing dinner. 
I'd pour myself a nice glass of wine and enjoy a meal for one. 
If he questioned the single serving, my response would be, "I thought you would be too tired to eat"
I love this tbh
18
Posts: 11412
Date: 14-10-2020 16:20
Private
World famous



Rotte wrote:
But you could still have come and not played? 
21
Posts: 70325
Date: 14-10-2020 16:45
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