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age gaps in hook ups relationships
Account deleted




wrote:
Cherry wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
kagura wrote:
there's nothing to be sorry about anything i just told happened to me? i did take damage from breaking heart because of some guy who was literally my age and was playing with me. not from hooking up with someone random 
yes like i said, we can't know about their experience in life and so on. so there's is bigger change for pursuing happening. but we don't know that about op here like i seriously don't even know their gender

just from the age gap it's creepy and gross
Would it also be creepy and gross if it was 29 and 37?
it would be slightly less creepy, because these are adults closer to having same experiences and stability/responsibilities in their lives
Date: 06-07-2021 13:29
Account deleted




wrote:
Cherry wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Cherry wrote:
Would it also be creepy and gross if it was 29 and 37?
it would be slightly less creepy, because these are adults closer to having same experiences and stability/responsibilities in their lives
You can't know how much experience and stability/responsibility every 19-21 year have, you know. Everyone is different and should be able to tell what's best for themselves. We're not children  And if op decides to pursue the guy, I'm sure he knows how to say no if he's uncomfortable.

Again, just wanna clarify that I'm not defending op's wish, I just feel very uncomfortable with your view on age gaps.
Date: 06-07-2021 13:35
Private
National Star



kagura wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Cherry wrote:
acidreflux wrote:

just from the age gap it's creepy and gross
Would it also be creepy and gross if it was 29 and 37?
it would be slightly less creepy, because these are adults closer to having same experiences and stability/responsibilities in their lives
but why does those things matter when it's just about hooking up, not a relationship 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 06-07-2021 13:37
Account deleted




wrote:
kagura wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Cherry wrote:
Would it also be creepy and gross if it was 29 and 37?
it would be slightly less creepy, because these are adults closer to having same experiences and stability/responsibilities in their lives
but why does those things matter when it's just about hooking up, not a relationship 

"hooking up" is still engaging w another person, and in this situation would be kinda fucked up as op works w the individual like ....
Date: 06-07-2021 13:38
Private
International Star



Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them
20
Posts: 39262
Date: 06-07-2021 13:40
Account deleted




wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them

i think there has to be some precautions from the older ones, because it can sometimes become innapropriate, but being friends w older women like 25+ has been a godsend for me.
Date: 06-07-2021 13:42
Account deleted




wrote:
Cherry wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Cherry wrote:
You can't know how much experience and stability/responsibility every 19-21 year have, you know. Everyone is different and should be able to tell what's best for themselves. We're not children  And if op decides to pursue the guy, I'm sure he knows how to say no if he's uncomfortable.

Again, just wanna clarify that I'm not defending op's wish, I just feel very uncomfortable with your view on age gaps.

x
With excluding the first gap there (because yes, that's not okay), I still believe everyone is different. If you are an adult, you are an adult. If you don't feel like an adult, it's probably best to stay clear of romance. There are several ways to feel like an adult, and if you feel chemistry with someone older/younger than you, then we have to assume everyone involved knows what's best for themselves.

To make another point, an age gap between 60 and 70 would probably be problematic due to different health stages. Saying so from family experience xD

u don't turn into an adult magically at your 18th birthday ...
Date: 06-07-2021 13:45
Private
International Star



Raquelle wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them
i think there has to be some precautions from the older ones, because it can sometimes become innapropriate, but being friends w older women like 25+ has been a godsend for me.
yea i agree

i've always had trouble being friends with people of my own age. and my best friend of seven years is seven years older than me... which was weird as fuck before but not anymore lol. 
but i think it's def creepy if a person Only has friends that are a lot younger than them.
20
Posts: 39262
Date: 06-07-2021 13:46
Private
National Star



kagura wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them
that's interesting too. my oldest friend is almost 50 years old woman lmao and it's nice. she's just like an extra auntie for me and we both have probably learn a lot from each others
but of course my friendship is very different with her than it is with my friends who are close to my age. i would find it weird if someone 35+ years old just randomly hangout with me and my friends 
but i don't find older people's company in general weird, probably since my siblings are 10+ years older than me and sisters are pretty much my besties 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 06-07-2021 13:46
Account deleted




wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
acidreflux wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them
i think there has to be some precautions from the older ones, because it can sometimes become innapropriate, but being friends w older women like 25+ has been a godsend for me.
yea i agree

i've always had trouble being friends with people of my own age. and my best friend of seven years is seven years older than me... which was weird as fuck before but not anymore lol. 
but i think it's def creepy if a person Only has friends that are a lot younger than them.

w/o a doubt ....
Date: 06-07-2021 13:47
Private
International Star



Raquelle wrote:
Cherry wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
honestly i think this is such an interesting topic
what about age gaps in normal friendships what do you people think of them
Most of my internet friends are 25+ and they're a blessing. In real life, I mostly hang out with people my age. During my first year at uni, though, I hung out with a group of people consisting of two 32 years, one 27 and one 21. I felt kinda like a poop sometimes, but it usually felt pretty natural
yea i kinda feel you 
my all and only uni friends are 10+ years older than me too, one of which has become a very good friend of mine during this first year in general. i tried so so hard to get in some groups / become friends with people my own age last autumn but yea it did not go well at all. got no friends at all. so i just started hanging out with the master's students... and here we are! 
20
Posts: 39262
Date: 06-07-2021 13:52
Private
International Star



Raquelle wrote:
Cherry wrote:
Raquelle wrote:
Cherry wrote:
Most of my internet friends are 25+ and they're a blessing. In real life, I mostly hang out with people my age. During my first year at uni, though, I hung out with a group of people consisting of two 32 years, one 27 and one 21. I felt kinda like a poop sometimes, but it usually felt pretty natural
yea i kinda feel you 
my all and only uni friends are 10+ years older than me too, one of which has become a very good friend of mine during this first year in general. i tried so so hard to get in some groups / become friends with people my own age last autumn but yea it did not go well at all. got no friends at all. so i just started hanging out with the master's students... and here we are! 
I feel that. I'm glad you found the master's students!

For me, this was back when I was studying echononmy, and most of the people my age were awful and just kep to themselves and their 'clicks'. Now at teaching school, I usually hang with people my age, when I'm actually at school and not in digital classes xD The difference between the 20/21 years at teaching studies and 32 years at economy studies is a small one, though! Age gaps between friends are usually a nice one, in my opinion
ughhh yea eco students are Horrible !!! i know the cliques etc
i study industrial management and engineering so we have quite many people who wanted to go economics but didn't get in... so a lot of cliques here too. luckily also some nerdy and nice people as well.
i'm so glad your studying situation and social circles changed for better
20
Posts: 39262
Date: 06-07-2021 14:03
Pavlov
International Star



Pavlov wrote:
nooo
15
Posts: 29813
Date: 06-07-2021 14:10
Wuwu
Minister of Pop



wuwu wrote:
no, as a 19 year old i cant image hooking up with a 27 year old, i definitely view people that age as in a very different place in life than me and any kind of romantic or sexual relationship would be very odd and probably complicated feelings wise
18
Posts: 6755
Date: 06-07-2021 14:16
Private
World Famous



Barbarella wrote:
Claire wrote:
like i think an age gap matters less in a hook up than in a like relationship situation but like i also think since this isnt like a rando you met on tinder or at a bar its someone you see regularly that complicates the situation
also the younger they are the more they struggle to manage/repress what they think are romantic feelings lol
20
Posts: 8725
Date: 06-07-2021 14:55
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