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my mom
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
haven't talked to her in a year but saw her during the past days bc i needed to grab my stuff etc and oh boy. all we talked about was my sister, her bf and her doing bad financially. i've been living abroad for three years and she didn't ask a single question about me.

she told me how she wanted to hire a cleaner for my sister (18 ) due to her bad mental state and has been cleaning her apartment and paying her rent for her (extremely good and valid but like lol she never helped me in any way when i was literally homeless in another country and later lived with a wild rat in a shared flat, my mental state used to be super bad but i had no one so i just had to work towards happiness myself )

i had my first job at 13 to earn some pocket money but as my sister turned 13 she just gave her money for.... nothing? she excused it with me having a job at that age, that it was fair that she could also buy stuff but i know that there would have been no way i would have been able to buy anything without that job i was basically her therapist before i moved out at 16 and she used to ask me for money all the time until i started lying that i'm broke. i don't really wish for that mother-daughter relationship but it hurts when she keeps complimenting my sister, how she's so social, has so much potential... i used to get bad grades on purpose to get her to notice me but she never did. it didn't matter that i always had good grades, that i also had a job on the side and i... i always filled every box to be a good kid. it feels almost as if i'm getting punished for that

(and the one time i ever tried to seek comfort from her, the time i told her that my ex had r-d me.... she just said "shit happens" and linked me an instagram page called "advice" )

glad to hopefully not to see her in a very long time again but it does feel bad
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 20:35 | Times changed: 2
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
no idea why some of the text is in italic, it's not on purpose lol
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 20:36
Private
International star



Utdatert wrote:
sounds like a narcissist
16
Posts: 6863
Date: 09-01-2022 20:37
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
Utdatert wrote:
sounds like a narcissist
idk. i think she has empathy, just not for me
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 20:39 | Times changed: 1
Private
National star



Sylvan wrote:
younger siblings are almost always treated better, idk why really
16
Posts: 17933
Date: 09-01-2022 20:41
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
sometimes i feel like just screaming at her face how i tried to kms multiple times, how i have a scar on my leg which will never fade, the dangerous ppl i've been involved with and hurt by, my past issues with alcohol, having had some sort of a psychosis....

sometimes i feel like just screaming all that at her face but it's not worth it. i feel like i always have to shock her to get a reaction and even then, there's usually not one. it's best to just keep my distance but considering that i have no relatives other than her and my sister, i wish things would be different but oh well, not worth it. my bf's family has always been nice
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 20:47
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
Sylvan wrote:
younger siblings are almost always treated better, idk why really
i think that's the parents learning how to parent in a healthy way. learning from the mistakes they did with the older siblings
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 20:48 | Times changed: 1
Private
World famous



luminescence wrote:
that sounds horrible, i'm so sorry you've had to put up with that 

have you ever asked your mom why she treats you two so differently? 
21
Posts: 24181
Date: 09-01-2022 21:23
TheWayfaringStranger
Queen of Queens



TheWayfaringStranger wrote:
I'm so sorry that your mother has treated you so badly. No one deserves that. 
20
Posts: 31157
Date: 09-01-2022 21:28
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
luminescence wrote:
that sounds horrible, i'm so sorry you've had to put up with that 

have you ever asked your mom why she treats you two so differently? 
whenever i do she denies everything. usually i don't think about this but the past days it's just been very out there. i'll continue not talking to her once everything is set up, it's not really worth it to try to analyze her reasons
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 21:33
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
TheWayfaringStranger wrote:
I'm so sorry that your mother has treated you so badly. No one deserves that. 
<33 luckily she'll be gone after a while again i think. at the latest when i'll leave the country again
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 21:34
Private
World famous



luminescence wrote:
Sera wrote:
luminescence wrote:
that sounds horrible, i'm so sorry you've had to put up with that 

have you ever asked your mom why she treats you two so differently? 
whenever i do she denies everything. usually i don't think about this but the past days it's just been very out there. i'll continue not talking to her once everything is set up, it's not really worth it to try to analyze her reasons
it's sad that she doesn't realise it, but i agree that it's probably the best to keep some distance
21
Posts: 24181
Date: 09-01-2022 21:48
Kalypso
International star



kalypso wrote:
im sorry to hear that, but sounds like you did the right decision by not talking with her anymore 
18
Posts: 20181
Date: 09-01-2022 21:52
Mookid
National star



mookid wrote:
hehe my little brothers get so much more shit, i never asked my parents for anything cause i knew there was no point in asking since i could never really get anything. my bros got a fucking ps4 for their birthday lol. but i know regardless of that at least the older one of them cant be having a healthy life there because the way my parents express themselves is kind of hotheaded and loud, they always talk over each other and seem pissed off by everything
(they also got a cat for them for christmas and im extremely allergic ":)". its not like i felt that welcomed to their house after i moved out anyways lmao)

so sorry you have to deal with this, you dont deserve this. if talking honestly to her doesn't work its good to have distance to make room for your recovery without actively being put down by her
18
Posts: 527
Date: 09-01-2022 22:22 | Times changed: 1
Private
International star



emogirrrl123 wrote:
kalypso wrote:
im sorry to hear that, but sounds like you did the right decision by not talking with her anymore 
Oh yeah. I didn't even realize how bad it was exactly before that "shit happens" comment and linking the "advice" instagram page after telling her one of the most traumatic things ever happened to me. My mental health improved so much after cutting her off completely. Looking forward to go back to that once everything is set. Probably going to see my sister at some point and give her advice from someone who has been through what she's going through rn. I only got her number this year and I'm hoping we can get to know each other better
18
Posts: 13218
Date: 09-01-2022 23:11
MissLondon
Queen of Queens



MissLondon wrote:
That sucks because I might
start to feel as if my mom favored my sibling more
but, I’d also feel pride in knowing 
that in spite of difficulties 
I was able to get on my feet
without any help from her.
20
Posts: 27725
Date: 09-01-2022 23:21
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