emogirrrl123 wrote:
haven't talked to her in a year but saw her during the past days bc i needed to grab my stuff etc and oh boy. all we talked about was my sister, her bf and her doing bad financially. i've been living abroad for three years and she didn't ask a single question about me.
she told me how she wanted to hire a cleaner for my sister (18 ) due to her bad mental state and has been cleaning her apartment and paying her rent for her (extremely good and valid but like lol she never helped me in any way when i was literally homeless in another country and later lived with a wild rat in a shared flat, my mental state used to be super bad but i had no one so i just had to work towards happiness myself )
i had my first job at 13 to earn some pocket money but as my sister turned 13 she just gave her money for.... nothing? she excused it with me having a job at that age, that it was fair that she could also buy stuff but i know that there would have been no way i would have been able to buy anything without that job i was basically her therapist before i moved out at 16 and she used to ask me for money all the time until i started lying that i'm broke. i don't really wish for that mother-daughter relationship but it hurts when she keeps complimenting my sister, how she's so social, has so much potential... i used to get bad grades on purpose to get her to notice me but she never did. it didn't matter that i always had good grades, that i also had a job on the side and i... i always filled every box to be a good kid. it feels almost as if i'm getting punished for that
(and the one time i ever tried to seek comfort from her, the time i told her that my ex had r-d me.... she just said "shit happens" and linked me an instagram page called "advice" )
glad to hopefully not to see her in a very long time again but it does feel bad