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General < General
AITA
Private
Youtube Star



Thisissomebodyelse wrote:
(Am I The A-hole)

I work 7 days a week sometimes 10+ hours a day. I make decent money but I work 2 entry level jobs and one teaching job. None of which pay great, hence why I work all the time. My husband works an office job at a call center 8-5 monday through friday. On sunday, after a family event without him and work, my husband and I went to the grocery store. I always buy groceries and make dinner because he is inept in the kitchen. This works for us because I make less but grocery shopping is always 1.5 weeks worth of pay. While there is told him to pick out frozen foods that he could eat. Things that were easy or that he just wanted, so he could make lunch/dinner for himself on those long days.
This morning I woke up early and made breakfast (that i did not eat), andthen went to work. 7 hours later I get home and he hasn't eaten anything since I left, the sink is full of dishes, the towels he put to dry (YESTERDAY!!) are still there. And i ask him if he wants anything to eat. "We dont really have anything so I guess ill make myself some chicken" and i snapped. 'I told you at the grocery store to pick something, there is pizza, corn dogs, chicken katsu, chicken sandwich, and fish in the freezer ready to heat. The grocery store was your opportunity to get things. I dont want to hear it' and now he isnt talking to me. 

Idk what to do, im so frustrated and overwhelmed. I just want to sit down and actually rest when I get home. But this is not my reality and I just want to cry.
8
Posts: 28
Date: 09-07-2026 01:29
Private
Youtube Star



Thisissomebodyelse wrote:
Sorry for the complaining...
I just, dont really have any friends anymore. They've all drifted away
8
Posts: 28
Date: 09-07-2026 01:30
Private
Streetmusician



kruspersille wrote:
obvi nta 
no reason for him to give u the silent treatment over that, u should probably sit down and have an actual conversation abt this
14
Posts: 62201
Date: 09-07-2026 01:41
Private
World Famous



Suchomimus wrote:
yes what krus said like is there a reason he didn't eat, or was it just that he couldn't be bothered 
also 7 days a week work Jesus Christ 
19
Posts: 40589
Date: 09-07-2026 01:46
Private
Minister of Pop



Maxwell wrote:
he's the asshole, his head in his ass
17
Posts: 36130
Date: 09-07-2026 01:51
Private
Youtube Star



Thisissomebodyelse wrote:
Suchomimus wrote:
yes what krus said like is there a reason he didn't eat, or was it just that he couldn't be bothered 
also 7 days a week work Jesus Christ 
he just couldn't be bothered to leave his room. he was gaming with the boys.
i hope u can hear my eyeroll. its so frustrating because i am not here to mother him. he has a mom!

yes, i get ~3 days off a month
8
Posts: 28
Date: 09-07-2026 01:51
MissLondon
Queen of Queens



MissLondon wrote:
Nta, I would feel resentful tho because he sits there waiting for a meal
like a child instead of a grown ass man.
inept in the kitchen is a lazy excuse esp when YouTube exists
20
Posts: 28526
Date: 09-07-2026 01:53
Private
International Star



meilin wrote:
Thisissomebodyelse wrote:
Suchomimus wrote:
yes what krus said like is there a reason he didn't eat, or was it just that he couldn't be bothered 
also 7 days a week work Jesus Christ 
he just couldn't be bothered to leave his room. he was gaming with the boys.
i hope u can hear my eyeroll. its so frustrating because i am not here to mother him. he has a mom!

yes, i get ~3 days off a month
wth  i hope your job situation gets better at some point 

also i agree with ppl above, obvs nta!
18
Posts: 13716
Date: 09-07-2026 02:35
Private
World Famous



bones wrote:
i would be so embarrassed if i was him a grown ass adult know how to use a fucking microwave
22
Posts: 43074
Date: 09-07-2026 03:04
Meister
National Star



Meister wrote:
To play the Devils Advocate. ( I wont give you the AITA VERDICT)
If we see this from your husbands view.
You are almost never home and maybe he wants to spend time with you but dont know how to say it.
It could also be that he is frustrated on his job and took it out on you. 
Yes he is an adult and can cook food for himself, he is also a an adult to clean after himself.
Does he take care of the cleaning or is it only you?
Im asking so i know how to give advice, if he never does anything at all home its time for _him_ to step up

Has he behaved like this before or is it something new?
If its something new you both need to sit down and talk about why he behaves s like this and what he and you both can do. If he does this often it might be time to separate, in a household you are 2 persons that work together and its not 1 vs 1.


I also know that is hard for people to talk about ow they feel and think and if they dont open up it will be harder in the life. If he has trouble to put words on why he behaves like that tell him to write things down. If he wont or refuse to communicate its better to walk away, if a person dont want to get help or refuses to talk and do things to get better they never will.
13
Posts: 2194
Date: 09-07-2026 06:25
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