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kissing n consent
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
I don't think u need to ASK someone for permission to kiss or even have sex with them, just be aware of social cues lol
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 30-04-2022 12:11
Private
Popstar



autism wrote:
yes i always ask and want people to ask me i also like having a conversation about the kiss beforehand i usually give people some kiss options because there's different kinds of kisses i play life like the sims makes things more comfortable to me also the people i usually kiss i don't usually kisskiss people who just kiss that would be nono
19
Posts: 43995
Date: 30-04-2022 12:11
Private
Popstar



autism wrote:
ouch wrote:
I don't think u need to ASK someone for permission to kiss or even have sex with them, just be aware of social cues lol
i'm autism
19
Posts: 43995
Date: 30-04-2022 12:12
Private
Princess of Pop



Arthema wrote:
ouch wrote:
I don't think u need to ASK someone for permission to kiss or even have sex with them, just be aware of social cues lol
that is exactly the problem
not everyone is good or ABLE to pick up on those so um
yeah
17
Posts: 39180
Date: 30-04-2022 12:15
Private
Princess of Pop



Arthema wrote:
consent is sexy changed my mind
17
Posts: 39180
Date: 30-04-2022 12:15
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
Abby wrote:
ouch wrote:
I don't think u need to ASK someone for permission to kiss or even have sex with them, just be aware of social cues lol
that is exactly the problem
not everyone is good or ABLE to pick up on those so um
yeah
No but usually you would be aware of that before kissing them anyway, so then u could ask, if u pick up on them being bad w social cues. I don't think u would be bad off assuming most people are neurotypical and go from there, many people with autism (probably earlier asperger) are also able to read social cues in a way that it would be ok to not ask them beforehand, its very rare I meet someone who isn't able to at all. Tho, I would not want to kiss a person if they asked me beforehand ouff lmao
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 30-04-2022 12:19
Private
Princess of Pop



Arthema wrote:
ouch wrote:
Abby wrote:
ouch wrote:
I don't think u need to ASK someone for permission to kiss or even have sex with them, just be aware of social cues lol
that is exactly the problem
not everyone is good or ABLE to pick up on those so um
yeah
No but usually you would be aware of that before kissing them anyway, so then u could ask, if u pick up on them being bad w social cues. I don't think u would be bad off assuming most people are neurotypical and go from there, many people with autism (probably earlier asperger) are also able to read social cues in a way that it would be ok to not ask them beforehand, its very rare I meet someone who isn't able to at all. Tho, I would not want to kiss a person if they asked me beforehand ouff lmao
I have too many cases I was NOT aware of it, unless it was like go with the flow moment? or if asked?
And it's not that I can't pick up social cues I just dealt with too many dipshits that made me wanna go home lol.

And I personally cannot day too much about people with autism as I'm not one, but I had 2 friends that were, one of them DID have an easier time, might've learned how to pick it up or read it? but still would ask things, and another one that I'm still friends with that is just...yeah he cannot read cues and in the past he would not ask at all and just be there, looking like :-)
and now he does ask so it's well... yeah
besides that idk.

I can understand why it might be off-putting to be asked about that, like maybe in FULL and have an actual convo about it, the sparks might be gone by that time lol
BUT like making it understandable enough but subtle it just
17
Posts: 39180
Date: 30-04-2022 12:28
Private
Popstar



ouch wrote:
Abby wrote:
ouch wrote:
Abby wrote:
that is exactly the problem
not everyone is good or ABLE to pick up on those so um
yeah
No but usually you would be aware of that before kissing them anyway, so then u could ask, if u pick up on them being bad w social cues. I don't think u would be bad off assuming most people are neurotypical and go from there, many people with autism (probably earlier asperger) are also able to read social cues in a way that it would be ok to not ask them beforehand, its very rare I meet someone who isn't able to at all. Tho, I would not want to kiss a person if they asked me beforehand ouff lmao
I have too many cases I was NOT aware of it, unless it was like go with the flow moment? or if asked?
And it's not that I can't pick up social cues I just dealt with too many dipshits that made me wanna go home lol.

And I personally cannot day too much about people with autism as I'm not one, but I had 2 friends that were, one of them DID have an easier time, might've learned how to pick it up or read it? but still would ask things, and another one that I'm still friends with that is just...yeah he cannot read cues and in the past he would not ask at all and just be there, looking like :-)
and now he does ask so it's well... yeah
besides that idk.

I can understand why it might be off-putting to be asked about that, like maybe in FULL and have an actual convo about it, the sparks might be gone by that time lol
BUT like making it understandable enough but subtle it just
Yeah thats why I mean you just have to see how they react to other stuff first, like if you see they aren't good with aocial cues u can make it more obvious or ask them flat out, or if u notice that they are good at social cues u can just do what regular ppl do, not ask, but depends on the situation obv. If someone just comes up to u at a bar or smth n they kiss u like thats weird, but thats also not non verbal consent. So as long as theres non verbal consent its fine imo
16
Posts: 95491
Date: 30-04-2022 12:35
Private
National star



kagura wrote:
ngl first time with my guy when we were in a situtation where it's pretty clear we don't have clothes on anymore within the next 10 minutes, he still asked me if he may kiss me and it was the sweetest thing ever 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 30-04-2022 12:38
Private
Princess of Pop



Arthema wrote:
ouch wrote:
Abby wrote:
ouch wrote:
No but usually you would be aware of that before kissing them anyway, so then u could ask, if u pick up on them being bad w social cues. I don't think u would be bad off assuming most people are neurotypical and go from there, many people with autism (probably earlier asperger) are also able to read social cues in a way that it would be ok to not ask them beforehand, its very rare I meet someone who isn't able to at all. Tho, I would not want to kiss a person if they asked me beforehand ouff lmao
I have too many cases I was NOT aware of it, unless it was like go with the flow moment? or if asked?
And it's not that I can't pick up social cues I just dealt with too many dipshits that made me wanna go home lol.

And I personally cannot day too much about people with autism as I'm not one, but I had 2 friends that were, one of them DID have an easier time, might've learned how to pick it up or read it? but still would ask things, and another one that I'm still friends with that is just...yeah he cannot read cues and in the past he would not ask at all and just be there, looking like :-)
and now he does ask so it's well... yeah
besides that idk.

I can understand why it might be off-putting to be asked about that, like maybe in FULL and have an actual convo about it, the sparks might be gone by that time lol
BUT like making it understandable enough but subtle it just
Yeah thats why I mean you just have to see how they react to other stuff first, like if you see they aren't good with aocial cues u can make it more obvious or ask them flat out, or if u notice that they are good at social cues u can just do what regular ppl do, not ask, but depends on the situation obv. If someone just comes up to u at a bar or smth n they kiss u like thats weird, but thats also not non verbal consent. So as long as theres non verbal consent its fine imo
sadly not everyone is able or uh
I wanna say have the balls? but that feels a bit disrespectful eee
like in the far past I was shyer?and had SO much trouble with it
and nowadays when I got a cue that told me to go for it I was just like yeeeah I'm going for it.

but yeah there are gestures for sure that might show consent that is not verbal, like our body language
17
Posts: 39180
Date: 30-04-2022 12:40
Private
Princess of Pop



Arthema wrote:
kagura wrote:
ngl first time with my guy when we were in a situtation where it's pretty clear we don't have clothes on anymore within the next 10 minutes, he still asked me if he may kiss me and it was the sweetest thing ever 
that is so sweet 
17
Posts: 39180
Date: 30-04-2022 12:52
MasileinDE
International star



MasileinDE wrote:
immediately thought about this
16
Posts: 11906
Date: 30-04-2022 13:26
MissLondon
Queen of Queens



MissLondon wrote:
If someone has to ask
for my permission 
it turns me off
It’s a vibe..you feel it
or you don’t 
20
Posts: 27725
Date: 30-04-2022 13:42
Private
International star



sapovnela wrote:
Claire wrote:
commander2 wrote:
i feel like u cn also sorta initiate it while leaving room 4 th other 2 kiss back if tht makes sense?
Like I wouldn't like if someone jsut does it bc im not a fan of kissing anyway 
like you can lean forward and see if they lean forward and then you lean closer and then they lean closer and then u can like move ur head and they close their eyes and weve basically had a conversation about how we about to kiss 
19
Posts: 1839
Date: 30-04-2022 14:28
Private
National star



kagura wrote:
Abby wrote:
kagura wrote:
ngl first time with my guy when we were in a situtation where it's pretty clear we don't have clothes on anymore within the next 10 minutes, he still asked me if he may kiss me and it was the sweetest thing ever 
that is so sweet 
yessss. i wouldn't have minded if he didn't, but it made me feel more safe with him 
14
Posts: 7616
Date: 30-04-2022 14:50
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