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we broke up
MissLondon
Queen of Queens



MissLondon wrote:
It’s great for hat you can remain friends 
and it’s not surprising that he’s moving on quickly 
guys generally don’t mourn relationships 
like women do.
20
Posts: 27555
Date: 06-10-2022 19:51
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
MissLondon wrote:
It’s great for hat you can remain friends 
and it’s not surprising that he’s moving on quickly 
guys generally don’t mourn relationships 
like women do.
I wonder why
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 06-10-2022 20:09
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
now he's all like "but why did we even try?"
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 08-10-2022 18:49
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
now he's all like "but why did we even try?"
and at the same time he says he doesn't think it's been wasted time
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 08-10-2022 18:58
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
now he's all like "but why did we even try?"
and at the same time he says he doesn't think it's been wasted time
this makes me feel like we won't be good as friends. clearly there is some bitterness from him about this situation even though he claims there isn't.
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 09-10-2022 18:22
Private
Popstar



Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
now he's all like "but why did we even try?"
and at the same time he says he doesn't think it's been wasted time
this makes me feel like we won't be good as friends. clearly there is some bitterness from him about this situation even though he claims there isn't.
usually being friends right after you break up, doesnt turn out too well. if you are to be friends, you should go no contact for at least a month to let the relationship properly die, so it doesnt come up in conversations anymore and any residual feelings can pass
22
Posts: 9159
Date: 09-10-2022 18:24 | Times changed: 1
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
and at the same time he says he doesn't think it's been wasted time
this makes me feel like we won't be good as friends. clearly there is some bitterness from him about this situation even though he claims there isn't.
usually being friends right after you break up, doesnt turn out too well. if you are to be friends, you should go no contact for at least a month to let the relationship properly die, so it doesnt come up in conversations anymore and any residual feelings can pass
from my end I'm fine with being friends directly after. I don't think he's being open to me about his feelings but at the same time is already looking for someone new. mixed signals. I feel like even if we don't talk in a month there's no going to be less things that are needed to talk about.
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 09-10-2022 18:28
Private
Popstar



Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
this makes me feel like we won't be good as friends. clearly there is some bitterness from him about this situation even though he claims there isn't.
usually being friends right after you break up, doesnt turn out too well. if you are to be friends, you should go no contact for at least a month to let the relationship properly die, so it doesnt come up in conversations anymore and any residual feelings can pass
from my end I'm fine with being friends directly after. I don't think he's being open to me about his feelings but at the same time is already looking for someone new. mixed signals. I feel like even if we don't talk in a month there's no going to be less things that are needed to talk about.
doesnt sound like its fine from his end, so for both your sakes, you should probably give him time to grieve the relationship and move on, even in his own weird way however he may do that. i have been in a similar situation, where i broke it off with a guy i wasnt very serious about, and we agreed to be friends after, and he just ended up getting really weird and possessive, asking me intrusive questions about whether i was already seeing someone new etc etc., even though he said he was completely fine and wanted to be friends. i ended up having to block him and we never spoke again (not that i even really wanted to be friends, when i think back on it now, it was just out of kindness towards him, because i knew he really liked me)

so yeah i would recommend, if you genuinely want to be friends, and youre not just saying/doing it out of kindness towards him bc you think it will make the break easier, you should give it some time before you initiate a new relationship with him as friends
22
Posts: 9159
Date: 09-10-2022 18:32
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Rouya wrote:
usually being friends right after you break up, doesnt turn out too well. if you are to be friends, you should go no contact for at least a month to let the relationship properly die, so it doesnt come up in conversations anymore and any residual feelings can pass
from my end I'm fine with being friends directly after. I don't think he's being open to me about his feelings but at the same time is already looking for someone new. mixed signals. I feel like even if we don't talk in a month there's no going to be less things that are needed to talk about.
doesnt sound like its fine from his end, so for both your sakes, you should probably give him time to grieve the relationship and move on, even in his own weird way however he may do that. i have been in a similar situation, where i broke it off with a guy i wasnt very serious about, and we agreed to be friends after, and he just ended up getting really weird and possessive, asking me intrusive questions about whether i was already seeing someone new etc etc., even though he said he was completely fine and wanted to be friends. i ended up having to block him and we never spoke again (not that i even really wanted to be friends, when i think back on it now, it was just out of kindness towards him, because i knew he really liked me)

so yeah i would recommend, if you genuinely want to be friends, and youre not just saying/doing it out of kindness towards him bc you think it will make the break easier, you should give it some time before you initiate a new relationship with him as friends
I feel like I am giving him space and time but I just don't feel like he's being honest with me. At the same time I can't let myself go around thinking he's lying so I feel like I have to take his word for it that he wants to be friends and as he says doesn't have any negative feelings towards me.
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 09-10-2022 18:38
Bloodflowers
Popstar



Bloodflowers wrote:
He also broke up what if his future girlfriend has a problem with him talking to me. Or the other way around. I told him that it was a red flag and probably is a behaviour that probably goes beyond only that. With jealousy. He agreed but idk why he's looking for problems.
17
Posts: 28907
Date: 09-10-2022 18:45
Private
Popstar



Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
Rouya wrote:
Bloodflowers wrote:
from my end I'm fine with being friends directly after. I don't think he's being open to me about his feelings but at the same time is already looking for someone new. mixed signals. I feel like even if we don't talk in a month there's no going to be less things that are needed to talk about.
doesnt sound like its fine from his end, so for both your sakes, you should probably give him time to grieve the relationship and move on, even in his own weird way however he may do that. i have been in a similar situation, where i broke it off with a guy i wasnt very serious about, and we agreed to be friends after, and he just ended up getting really weird and possessive, asking me intrusive questions about whether i was already seeing someone new etc etc., even though he said he was completely fine and wanted to be friends. i ended up having to block him and we never spoke again (not that i even really wanted to be friends, when i think back on it now, it was just out of kindness towards him, because i knew he really liked me)

so yeah i would recommend, if you genuinely want to be friends, and youre not just saying/doing it out of kindness towards him bc you think it will make the break easier, you should give it some time before you initiate a new relationship with him as friends
I feel like I am giving him space and time but I just don't feel like he's being honest with me. At the same time I can't let myself go around thinking he's lying so I feel like I have to take his word for it that he wants to be friends and as he says doesn't have any negative feelings towards me.
yes you cant do anything other than just take him at his word, if he's lying and has some type of feelings towards you, negative or romantic, then that's his problem

i would still recommend going no contact for a while to let it rest first but up to you, but it doesnt sound like its going to end well with the things youre describing that he's doing and saying
22
Posts: 9159
Date: 09-10-2022 19:21
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