breaking up - Forum - Virtual Popstar

Private
World Famous

Versailles wrote:

cobain wrote:

Lolinontot wrote:
Bruh he's going through all the stages of grief at the same time all combined with a very childish behaviour of playing both the blame game and the aggressive child bully game......

Just make sure that once he starts the pleeding to get you back game, don't fall for it.
Take care of yourself ~ sending all my positive powers to you!!

Also I think he's threatening your non-existent partner because he thinks it's "charming"
In a freaky messed up way- men tend to think that women want men that are willing to fight over them, It's really primitive of him to act like that really, and if you're ever going to respond to that then just respond by saying you'd call the police cause that's not cool, that's called assault.
And that's not okay even if he means it as a joke because he's scaring you. - a joke is meant to be funny - that's just threatening.

this has actually been one of the red flags i noticed quite early on but i didn't care or smth
he reacts quite strongly to a lot of things. he reacts esp with frustration and anger, he's angry at a lot which became quite draining. like he wasn't angry at me a lot, but just things in general. if someone looked at him on the street he could take GREAT offense to it and i always told him to shut the hell up and chill bc they didn't mean shit by looking at him. lol.
he punches things when he gets angry too but i asked him to stop because it makes me feel uneasy and a bit scared so he actually stopped. so theres that

thank you !

That sounds scary ngl, esp with punching things reaction outburts. Altough he stopped it shows he's capable to punch things, and things can be people and that's scary. Idc if it's drunk-fights even it's just so bad and potentionally be ppl near to him.
For gods sake i'm glad he doesn't have kids and got huge issues he needs to work on before being in a commited healthy relationship and let alone start a family.

I understand you're upset and look on the good memories - but you need to remind yourself why it had to be ended too. I'm proud of you for taking this step before it getting more serious honestly. Take care of yourself and I understand you didn't want to hurt him.
Don't feel guilty for not staying in a relationship that simply just didn't work out.
take care <3

Private
National Star

Miguel wrote:

cobain wrote:

kruspersille wrote:
wait hes almost 40???

hhhhh yeah he turns 40 in january

i literally thought this man was like 25 what the fuck
bestie block him

Private
National Star

Miguel wrote:
like honestly id be a bit scared if i were u. give him all the things that are his, and never contact him again like deadass
at this point he can not change, he's almost 40!!!!! like what the fuck!
get away from him for your own safety

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:

Versailles wrote:

cobain wrote:

Lolinontot wrote:
Bruh he's going through all the stages of grief at the same time all combined with a very childish behaviour of playing both the blame game and the aggressive child bully game......

Just make sure that once he starts the pleeding to get you back game, don't fall for it.
Take care of yourself ~ sending all my positive powers to you!!

Also I think he's threatening your non-existent partner because he thinks it's "charming"
In a freaky messed up way- men tend to think that women want men that are willing to fight over them, It's really primitive of him to act like that really, and if you're ever going to respond to that then just respond by saying you'd call the police cause that's not cool, that's called assault.
And that's not okay even if he means it as a joke because he's scaring you. - a joke is meant to be funny - that's just threatening.

this has actually been one of the red flags i noticed quite early on but i didn't care or smth
he reacts quite strongly to a lot of things. he reacts esp with frustration and anger, he's angry at a lot which became quite draining. like he wasn't angry at me a lot, but just things in general. if someone looked at him on the street he could take GREAT offense to it and i always told him to shut the hell up and chill bc they didn't mean shit by looking at him. lol.
he punches things when he gets angry too but i asked him to stop because it makes me feel uneasy and a bit scared so he actually stopped. so theres that

thank you !

That sounds scary ngl, esp with punching things reaction outburts. Altough he stopped it shows he's capable to punch things, and things can be people and that's scary. Idc if it's drunk-fights even it's just so bad and potentionally be ppl near to him.
For gods sake i'm glad he doesn't have kids and got huge issues he needs to work on before being in a commited healthy relationship and let alone start a family.

I understand you're upset and look on the good memories - but you need to remind yourself why it had to be ended too. I'm proud of you for taking this step before it getting more serious honestly. Take care of yourself and I understand you didn't want to hurt him.
Don't feel guilty for not staying in a relationship that simply just didn't work out.
take care <3

i was with someone when i was 18-19 who was very abusive and he used to punch things and get irrationally angry, and i was scared he was gonna punch me next. i was never scared in this relationship he was gonna punch me tho, it was different. he did punch things but it didn't have anything to do with me or what i'd done, but it still made me feel weird and made me anxious bc it reminded me of that previous relationship. and anger is scary in general, i don't respond well to it bc i have some baggage. lol
he has adhd and i think that's partly why he gets those outbursts. not saying that every single person with adhd is violent and can't control their emotions, but for HIM i think it's one of the reasons. he used to live quite a wild life too, filled with drugs (both using and selling), beating ppl up, weapons, n criminality in general. it's not THAT long ago he left that life, but ofc he has lived the majority of his adult life in that scene so it's hard to get rid of some behaviours i guess. so like all that in combination with each other is why i believe he is prone to be violent

i honestly think that if he worked on himself and his wellbeing more, he'd be a great partner to someone. he's just stuck in this victim mentality where he believes everyone and everything is out to get him and it brings him down so much. he's negative af and when it's sooo draining for me, i can't imagine how draining it is for himself. i wish he could just.. at least try to be more positive, and not be so insecure. he IS a good person, a great person even, and so strong for being where he is despite how he has lived. he doesn't really see it like that. i wish he went out to see people more too because that would do him good. he talks to his friends regularly but i'd like for him to physically see them more bc i think that would be better for him, instead of sitting alone in his apartment for the most part

thank you so much ♡♡♡♡

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:
i haven't been sad today. i feel a bit empty and anxious when thinking about him and stuff but no sadness which feels weird..... and i feel guilty in a way for not being so sad. but maybe i still haven't processed it, the sadness may come later on. who knows.
strangely enough it feels good to be at work bc i don't need to think so much. i normally hate my job. actually hate HATE it. but it's been ok lately, mostly bc of the ppl i've worked with. and i think it's gonna be easier for me to balance work and my private life now when i'm single bc i don't have to think of someone else or make plans or be with someone else so much. i'm already surrounded by ppl at work constantly. smth my bf didn't seem to understand, that i desperately needed my alone time when i'm alwaysssss with people and catering to people and taking care of people at work (and i work A LOT). the alone time i got wasn't enough but i couldn't ask for more bc then he felt like i was neglecting him, which i probably was too. idk. i do realize i wasn't a great girlfriend to him either, but i couldn't be. bc everything was too much for me

i think i've figured out a series i can watch! lovesick, one of my favs. it's about relationships, breakups, ups and downs. so even tho it's about relationships and i don't wanna be reminded, i think it'll do me good. and i know this a series he wouldn't have enjoyed so i don't need to think of that, that he's missing out on something

BunnyButts
International Star

BunnyButts wrote:
I send lots a love breakups are hard

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:

BunnyButts wrote:
I send lots a love breakups are hard

♡♡♡♡♡

Private
Popstar

ouch wrote:
When me n my ex broke up (he was a poop too btw, manipulative n the whole thing) I was like,, sad mby the first day, but then I just realized how fucked up he was n I never felt sad abt it again. I also thought like "mby im having a delayed reaction or sum, ill be sad later probbaly" but it just never happened 🤔 hopefully same for u

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:
just told my dad. sad, he loves my bf (or..... ex........ weird to say that)
bc he called me n started talking about my bf and i told him we've broken up. he was like "noooooo why?? man i really liked him" and i said like yeah he is a great person but it didn't work out
dad said it's my life and my decision but it was sad it didn't work out. he also said he wanted to stay friends with him and i'm just.... ehhh... maybe not for a while at least..... weird af if my dad and him are friends but we're no contact. doubt my bf would be very willing to stay friends with him right now too, but probably after some time has passed. they really hit it off

i don't wanna think about how his parents react. they really liked me. and i really liked them
i hugged his mom for the first time last weekend : /////// bc covid u know, we were finally able to. i hope they know that i really appreciated them and liked them. and i hope he doesn't talk too much shit about me to them. but they're probably more understanding of the situation than he is
idk if my mom knows, maybe my sister has told her. otherwise i'm gonna have to tell her this weekend when i go there. i don't talk a lot about personal things w my mom but last time we broke up i opened up a bit n she was very understanding n helpful. she really liked him too, but she never had a connection with him like my dad does

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:

ouch wrote:
When me n my ex broke up (he was a poop too btw, manipulative n the whole thing) I was like,, sad mby the first day, but then I just realized how fucked up he was n I never felt sad abt it again. I also thought like "mby im having a delayed reaction or sum, ill be sad later probbaly" but it just never happened 🤔 hopefully same for u

breakups are weird dude
rn i just feel like i'm getting very needed alone time. although i miss him and it feels weird but yeah. i thought i'd be bedridden due to crying so much lol. bc that's how it was the last time we broke up
but i got time to mentally prepare myself, as he said. he was right about that. mayb that has something to do with it

Private
National Star

kagura wrote:

cobain wrote:
just told my dad. sad, he loves my bf (or..... ex........ weird to say that)
bc he called me n started talking about my bf and i told him we've broken up. he was like "noooooo why?? man i really liked him" and i said like yeah he is a great person but it didn't work out
dad said it's my life and my decision but it was sad it didn't work out. he also said he wanted to stay friends with him and i'm just.... ehhh... maybe not for a while at least..... weird af if my dad and him are friends but we're no contact. doubt my bf would be very willing to stay friends with him right now too, but probably after some time has passed. they really hit it off

i don't wanna think about how his parents react. they really liked me. and i really liked them
i hugged his mom for the first time last weekend : /////// bc covid u know, we were finally able to. i hope they know that i really appreciated them and liked them. and i hope he doesn't talk too much shit about me to them. but they're probably more understanding of the situation than he is
idk if my mom knows, maybe my sister has told her. otherwise i'm gonna have to tell her this weekend when i go there. i don't talk a lot about personal things w my mom but last time we broke up i opened up a bit n she was very understanding n helpful. she really liked him too, but she never had a connection with him like my dad does

ngl the hardest part of break up is breakig up with their parents.. or no the worst part is that you don't even get a change to say goodbye to them! and you know they are sad about that too and it's not their fault in any way

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:
ok i actually started missing him like crazy now
i've worked a 12h shift and when i walked home idk smth just felt strange bc i wasn't gonna go to his place and like fall into his arms n shit, like i usually do after a long shift. we haven't spoken in 2 days, we haven't seen each other for a week now. i miss him and i'm crying

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:
the thought of never hugging him again, never kissing him again. not telling him about my day. not laughing together and having fun. i'll never have that with him again wtf

Gilmore
World Famous

Gilmore wrote:

cobain wrote:
the thought of never hugging him again, never kissing him again. not telling him about my day. not laughing together and having fun. i'll never have that with him again wtf

It'll fortunately get better, super quick too if he's a shit burger

Cobain
International Star

cobain wrote:
met our friend randomly
it's mainly his friend tho. they have known each other for yearsssss but we all ended up at the same job last year so i got to know him very well too. he's my parents age and also knows my parents bc they lived in the same area when i was a kid and i played w his son and shit (cant remember that tho)

he asked if i was going to my bf and i was like SHITTTT he doesn't know so i'm gonna have to tell him.
i was like "hehe no to the store" and then he said he heard we broke up yeah he said it was sad and that my bf is veeery sad bc he adores me so so much. fuck. anyways we had a small chat, some catching up, he was gonna ask my bf to come take a cig with him and the other day they were supposed to hang out for a bit but it didnt happen bc stuff got in the way.
i'm actually glad he's reaching out to friends for support. he's so bad at that but there's no way he's gonna be able to go through this on his own. so that was nice to hear
i just hope he doesn't tell my bf that i seemed fine or happy or smth. i mean i know i came off like that bc first off i was going to the store and i can't look a mess. second of all i don't wanan talk about our business when i've barely talked to my bf about it. and i just don't wanna cry n be sad in front of people, esp not out in public like that. and not when seeing a friend i don't see that much

anyways today has been ok. i miss him but i'm not sad. a coworker of mine talked about her bf and their issues and it was kinda nice to hear? not that i'm glad that they experience issues but it made me feel less alone and sad lol. and i think that was kinda what she was going for when talking to me about it

evening is here and i feel alone and restless but idk i can literally do whatever the fuck i want. i've dyed and trimmed my eyebrows so there's that. tested out some eyeshadow shit. might play sims now idk
tomorrow i'm going to my moms, she's gonna make my fav dinner 🥰🥰🥰 i'm most likely gonna spend the night, my niece will spend the night too and i've LONGED to spend some quality time with her. ever since i moved out last year i don't see my sisters kids as much, naturally, but it's sad bc i love them all to bits.
on sunday i'm gonna make dinner at home, for myself! and do face masks n stuff, just take care of myself 🥰
sorry this turned into my diary lmao