Cry - Forum - Virtual Popstar

Private
World famous

Clegane wrote:
So I have a new beau

Y'all remember me saying my ex is 37?
Well my parents/family tolerated it but when I finally broke it off they were like thank god, that was so weird!!

but yesterday and today I spent the whole day with an ex colleague of mine after we got talking on social media and woow
That guys is making me feel things I haven't been able to feel before
Because he's gentle and gentlemanly and makes me feel safe which is probably exactly what I need after my traumatic last relationship

But the problem is.... he's 41!!

And I'm almost 22
Which is a huge difference
My sister was like "your men keep getting older"
And I mean yeah it's not ideal seeing as I wanna have a family and stuff but I can't help who I get attracted to

Anyways I really don't know how to break this to my parents?? They'd respect my choice sure but I think they'd be deeply disappointed in me

Also he has 3 kids with his ex wife
They are 9, 11 and....20!!!

He says it feels surreal to him and he'd never expected this
He also asked me often if I'm okay with such an age gap
Also he said he knows I want to have kids really badly but he can't promise if he'll want to have more kids or not later in life
Which is like :-/ hnnng

But we share so many interests and he seems like a truly good and genuine man for once

I am a MESS

Private
Youtube star

devilcake wrote:
watsup with vp people being like "im so bad im a mess imdoing bad decisions" and then just ignoring it like ok

anyways if hes dating someone the same age as his child hes fucked in the head break up with him bye

Private
National star

kagura wrote:
yeah no

MissLondon
Queen of Queens

MissLondon wrote:
Maybe you feel those things
simply because they didn’t exist with
the last relationship and you don’t come
across as someone who has dated a lot
or has a lot of experience.

As for the age gap, are you looking
for someone to take care of you?
If that’s your desire, go for something
closer to your own age.

That aside, if someone is already
saying no to kids, keep it moving
because it might be a waste of time
waiting/hoping that they will change
their mind.

As for the kids, imagine if one of your parents
brought someone home that’s
the same age as you..I’d definitely ask
my mom some questions

Sevo
Youtube star

Sevo wrote:
break up what the hell

Account deleted

wrote:
not to be rude or judgy, but men that age going for 21 year olds is kinda creepy to me.. something feels off about it

Private
World famous

Babel wrote:
Men twice the age of the women they're going for usually go for the young women because they can't attract women of their own age for various reasons. Most of these reasons being, that they know women their own age usually have matured enough to not put up with the men's bullshit and have experience enough to actually set healthy boundaries in the relationship.

Believe me - you can easily find someone closer to your own age interested in starting a family, and the chance of them leaving you for a younger model when you've grown older is also smaller. (Also if you want to start a family then don't be with a man who's told you he doesn't want to start said family)

Asmi
Popstar

Asmi wrote:
If your future plans don't match up, maybe rethink it? In the end it's your choice, but you don't have to give up your future plans for him.

Alam
World famous

Alam wrote:
"I'm such a mess uwu" and "I'm stable and mature enough to date someone literally twice my age and to protect myself from predators" don't go together love
Also what kind of weirdo not only dates someone who could be their child but is actually the age of their actual child the fuck

Private
World famous

Clegane wrote:

Alam wrote:
"I'm such a mess uwu" and "I'm stable and mature enough to date someone literally twice my age and to protect myself from predators" don't go together love
Also what kind of weirdo not only dates someone who could be their child but is actually the age of their actual child the fuck

I am mature enough

Probably just not stable enough

Private
Youtube star

Delusion1111111 wrote:
it would b one thing if u said 'im 22 hes 41 but he is the best man i have ever met, we are so compatible and want the same things in life and i cant believe how funny intelligent handsome caring compassionate and wonderful he is, ive never met anyone like him'. then i might have been like . hm.

but u didnt say that. u said 'im 22 hes 41. i want children really badly but he doesnt want any more kids but we share so many interests and he seems like a truly good and genuine man for once ... he makes me feel safe'

do u see the difference ? there is a BIG difference. huge difference. humongous difference

there are so many men out there who will make u feel safe and who are truly good and genuine men. those qualities should not be enough to make u want to b with someone, ESPECIALLY a 41 yr old that doesnt want to start a family which is something that u want

Private
Youtube star

Delusion1111111 wrote:
it just seems like self destructive self harm at this point... i promise u , it is possible to find someone who makes u feel safe, is good, genuine, wants a family with u , and is a whole long list of other positive qualities. and is closer to u in age. dont settle for these old ass weirdos n dont waste ur youth on them

Private
Youtube star

Delusion1111111 wrote:
like im literally not even against age gap relationships under all circumstances - i think it is entirely possible for a grown woman to make the choice to b w an older man and it all works fine, its fine, cool . but this isnt one of those situations . this makes me feel icky tbh, like ur not aware of ur self worth n ur settling - which is incidentally how i felt when u would talk abt ur last relationship . theres a pattern