🖋️ a sad day... |
yesterday was a sad day. today is a sad day. the coming days are probably also gonna be sad days. and that's okay. yesterday, on December 3rd, my forever baby boi Sigge had to be put to rest. I've lost pets before, but this one hit different. I got him in 2018, just a couple of months after I moved into my first apartment, after that it was us against the world. He was the cuddliest, most talkative cat you could find. I would go through fire for him. But it went too fast, his poor little body was too sick, it was too late for me to save him. He had been picky with his food for a little bit, then he went from kinda worrisome to really bad overnight. It was diabetes, it was unknown and had gone untreated for too long. On Friday afternoon we went to the emergency vet 2 hours away. I thought he was gonna die in the car on the way there, but my strong little man fought so hard. He was admitted to the ICU and I still had some hope that he would pull through. After the first update on Saturday, my hope slowly withered away. Despite being put on multiple IV's, his liver was in a bad state and he had inflammation on several organs. I decided to give him a fair chance, he had not even been there for 24 hours, let's see if there's any improvement on Sunday. There was no improvement. There would probably not be any improvement on Monday either. So I had to decide. Did I want to give him another chance and another day, throw a tremendous amount of money in the trash just for it not to work out. Or do I accept that I was just... too late? A decision I know I might have to take as the owner, but not when your baby was fine a week ago and is only 7 years old. It was too soon for him to go, but he had fought hard enough, he deserved to not be in pain. Had I been a millionaire maybe the outcome would've been different. Had I noticed that he was sick earlier maybe he would've had the energy to come out of it. A lot of what ifs. The what ifs are what's killing me. I've went over every scenario both in my head and with every family member and everything points to the same thing. I did everything I could. But it just wasn't enough. We got 5 beautiful years together. But oh how I would give everything to get at least 5 more. at least he got to feel the snow one last time farewell my sweet angel bby. you will be eternally missed. if there's anything to take away from this, it's to please get insurance for you babies. you don't think you're ever gonna need it, but when the day comes, you'll be so thankful you have it. without insurance, i would've never been able to give Sigge a fair chance. |